skheehee
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Everything posted by skheehee
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Yes, we deserve better. Much better. Putting our exes on a pedestal is only pulling us back from achieving our true potential.
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I gotta second you on this, NjoyStick. Mick, I used to be like you, constantly checking checking on her profile at first, then slowly, checking in once in a while, to see any hints, any "hope" of her getting back to me. Then I realised after a while that all I'm doing was just stopping myself from truly healing, as all plastered over her Facebook wall are photos of her and the new guy(some in suggestive poses), and stupid declarations of "love" between the both of them, and it hurt me pretty darn good. Then, I did what should have done a long time ago. I stopped. And now, I feel much better. What you don't know won't hurt you. It's not true for everything, but in this case, it would help you, A LOT. So stop checking in on her dude. Take it as though there's nothing left for you with her, and instead of putting her on a pedestal, think of her negative traits. Then, you will see her in a different light and you wouldn't want to check up on someone like that, would you?
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End of Day 22 Just another day, I guess. I've given up hope on reconciliation with her, unless if she initiates it. Even then, I will tread cautiously. A part of me wants to reach out to her so bad and tell her how I feel, and smother her with all the lovey-Dover confessions, but another part of me knows that such acts are just desperate and futile, that I need focus on picking myself up again and moving forward, not looking back. I still love her. I just don't want her in my life anymore.
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Well, you're not alone in the "wishing of crap" part, that's for sure.
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End of Day 21 Felt pretty good about myself after today. I watched "The Dark Knight Rises" and felt like I could really identify with the protagonist. For those who have not watched the movie, PLEASE WATCH IT! In a way, the movie can help you face your inner demons and overcome them. You'll feel much better after doing so.
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Hey mates. Thank you for your kind words. Honestly though, if not for some really motivating threads on ENA and the positive attitude on the outlook of life by people like Zorba (who is long gone), SuperDave, CrapAtNC, love4life, and many others, I wouldn't have the drive to be where I am today. Yeah, there is the possibility of getting back together with an ex after periods of NC or being NONCHALANT to their attempts and "reaching out" to you. Always remember the saying though, "Once bitten, twice shy." We got played like puppets, our hearts toyed with, with no regard to how we would end up feeling at the end. Who's to say that they won't do it again, if we were to get back together? I would rather turn and keep walking with my head held high and my eyes fixed firmly onto the horizon for new opportunities ahead, than to keep turning back and looking at the carnage behind me, wondering what could have been, and should have been. We have to stop beating ourselves up for whatever happened, and strive to do whatever it takes to be better people in the future. For in our future, there is only one person who will certainly be around. And that person, is YOU.
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End of Day 20 Just another day. I didn't really think much about her as I was asleep for most part of the day. I'm starting to think of her lesser everyday. I've stopped putting her on the pedestal and instead, I've replaced her, with ME. I am important now. No one decides my future apart from MYSELF. I am the commander of my own ship. If my first mate jumps ship, I still have to regain control of my crew and my ship and maintain my course. I decide my own destiny, and I'm not letting anyone stop me.
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End of Day 19 My mind kept wandering during those times when I was sitting idle and doing nothing. To thoughts of her, and the happy moments. Well, I'd keep it at that. I'd just picture her happy beside me, in my head, and that is enough for me. I do not need her, and my life does not revolve around her, but I do love those times when she smiled or laughed. I do no need her physical presence anymore. She is 'with' me all the time, and I'm content just the way it is now.
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I find it sad too. Don't you just hate it when you're doing seemingly fine for the day when all of a sudden, your mind drifts back to him/her and all the good times you had with them? Complete strangers we are now, and I guess, we have to accept the fact that it's really over. Looking on the bright side though, what goes around comes around, and a brighter lies ahead of us.
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I was thinking of getting a cat from the animal shelter, but then again, the ex loves cats. So I stopped myself. Maybe I should just get a bulldog? Hm... But she likes those too. Seriously, a lot things that I go through everyday remind me of her, and it saddens me and makes me mad at the same time!
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End of Day 18 Today went by really fast. I'm surprised at how much more I was able to achieve now that I'm whole again, that I am my own man. I've been talking to myself a lot nowadays, convincing myself that this has really happened and I can't do anything about it. I think I am beginning to experience what Blondie176 is going through right now. The acceptance of the break up and letting her go. As much as I love her, I dont think we are for each other as of now. Maybe in the future, but the future holds possibilities which are endless.
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I just had a weird but pleasant dream. In it, I met the woman I've been waiting for my whole life. The love of my life, so to speak. I cant remember how she looks like though... But I do remember falling madly in love with her in my dreams, and kissing her. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world. And then, she disappeared and I woke up in tears again. What does this mean? Am I looking too much into a dream? Is it just a fool's hope to think that I will find someone who I can spend the rest of my life with soon, after my heart was so viciously torn apart and shattered by another???
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I hear ya. I wish things had gone down differently. But that's just wishful thinking. I think either option is just as bad as the other.
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End of Day 17 Well, just another day. The hurt is still there, but it's not as bad as the first few weeks. NC attempt 3 or 4. I can remember which. I now know what kind of person my ex really is. The world would be a much better place if not for people like her. The worst part of it all is that people like me actually still love people like her, after what they've done to us. Love is really blind. It can lead you to walking right off a cliff.
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NC is for ourselves, and OURSELVES only. It is NOT a means to get our exes back, mates. It is a means of moving on with our lives. It just happens to be that when we're about to move on completely, sometimes, our exes would make make contact and like to reconcile, or whatever they have in mind. By then, you would be in a clearer state of mind to make a rational and logical decision based on taking time apart from each other and seeing the relationship and this person for what it is and who they are really. Keep your chins up people! There are brighter days ahead!
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End of Day 16 Today was a mix of emotions. I thought about her at times, but kept thinking of all the bad stuff that she did to me during the relationship. And I thought to myself that since she was so eager to get into a relationship with any Tom, ****, or Hairy right after our break up, I guess she's not worth my time worrying over. The baggage that she has from our break up will be holding her down. She has issues that she has not resolved. I'm gonna pretend to not care anymore, even though a small part of me still does. She hurt me, and kicked me to the curb, like a 2nd rate doll. Why should I waste time on someone so heartless...
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Dude, this was outright MANIPULATION. This is MINDF***ING at its best! You have to be strong the next time round and really act as though you've got something more important to attend to at the moment. Would you rather let her do this to you, or would you rather walk away and save yourself some dignity? No offense, my friend, but she seems like the kind of person you don't deserve to be with, with her mind games. You deserve better. Just calmly tell her that you've got something urgent/important to attend to the next time and walk away. I believe you're strong enough to do so.
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Yeah dude. Its hard to let go and accept the fact that the relationship with your ex is over. Acceptance will take time. I know I will take quite a long time as 3 years worth of memories is not easy to just discard(some people have the ability though!). Go out and just have fun! You could go on casual dates, or just hang out with your friends, male or female. Just do things to keep your mind off her. I know I am.
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Day 15 I actually got 6 hours of sleep last night. It's the first time in 2 months. I still woke up thinking about her, but I would force myself into thinking how she played me out and is probably in bed with her new guy right now, so it makes me just not bother about her and I'll go back to sleep. Don't get me wrong. I still love her. I just don't think I will accept her for who she is at the moment. Time will tell if she wakes up from her fancy dream.
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Amen to that brother. We are men, and we will stand with our shoulders back and our heads held high. We better than our exes as we are facing our demons head on, and not looking for a quick fix. We are all here for anyone who feels down and hope slipping away.
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I second that notion. They're the ones who screwed us over. We're hurting while they're havin all the fun.
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Day 14 I never thought that I'd make it this far. I haven't logged onto Facebook, because I don't see a point in doing so. I waste a lot of time over there anyway. I'm at work now, and occasionally, my mind would drift to the good times I had with her. When that happens, I force myself to think of all the negatives that she brought into the relationship, and how she SCREWED ME OVER. That just gives me drive to continue walking. I look back, sometimes, but I think in time, I will look back less and eventually, shake the dust off my shoulders and run into the horizon. A friend whose dad committed suicide once told me that time does not really heal the wounds. It's through accepting that whatever happened, has happened. I think most of us are still in denial that maybe, our exes have really "moved on" from us. Acceptance will take time, thus, the popular quote "Time heals". Through acceptance, will we eventually move on, and find peace in our hearts.
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I feel you, Blondie. It's just amazing how conveniently easy it is for them to forget everything we have done and gone through together, with someone they barely know. That makes 2 more pissed people in the world now.
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Thanks buddy! I still love and miss my ex too, but I don't think I can ever take her back now. The very thought of them in bed together just makes me sick to the very core of my soul.