radiofoot

Just like you, my life is complicated too. My advice is to take it easy and take it one day at a time. Maybe this Julie chick seems like what you would want in a lover, but after you get close you might realize you just screwed a great friendship. I have had girls that I thought I wanted, then I dated them and our friendship was forever all messed up. Well, some we fixed, but anyways... my advice is date the other girl, date lots of girls and you will find one that is right for you. You sound like you are still young and life just keeps getting more complicated as you grow older. Have fun while you are still young and date lots of different girls, so when you meet the one right for you, you won't let her slip away. Oh yeah, and one more thing, whatever you do just don't play games with Julie by dating Terra and trying to make her jealous, etc. You're above that. peace, -radiofoot

Thanks for the encouraging words princess. It's hard for guys to talk about these kinds of things with their friends. I'm actually already feeling quite a bit better. You were right, I am older. I'm almost 25 and I am looking more to settle down than to go to drunken frat parties. I already lived that part of my life and now it just seems "boring" to go out partying like that. Don't get me wrong, I like to party, but I would prefer to be with some of my best friends in small number than 50 drunk people. I have noticed actually since she has been gone that I am working out more, drinking beer less, and just kinda taking it one day at a time. My band is going down the West Coast on tour next week and that should help a lot more! Thanks a lot for the kind words of advice, I really appreciate it and I like this enotalone.com thing. Great idea. Take care, hope to hear from you again soon. -radiofoot

thank you, you just made me feel a whole lot better. i think i can manage to get on with things now that everything I was thinking was logically laid out on the table. THANK YOU!

Here is my problem: I was with my girlfriend for around 2&1/2 years. We did everything together, maybe spent too much time together cause we would fight a lot. We would always make up though and we really did (and do) love each other a lot. Recently she was spending a lot of time out with friends late into the night and sometimes getting drunk and not coming home at all. (She recently turned 21, so I kind of understood). I didn't like this though, also since we had started going out she had gained a lot of weight. I had talked with her numerous times about her weight and I know it is a very sensitive subject for girls so I tried to go easy on her. I offered to change my diet as well and excercise with her, whenever, wherever. She never really stayed with any program but did agree to the fact that she needed to lose the weight since she had become unhealthy. Anyways, I'm making this into a long ass story, just wanted to get the facts out in case they have some bearing on this whole ordeal. So, we live together and about a month ago we started fighting really bad, calling each other names and whatnot. We were in separate places for a few days and I called her and told her I wanted to talk with her (in a bad way to give her a heads-up and prepare her). So, I broke up with her and we both balled our freakin eyes out. She agreed that we needed to break-up since it just wasn't working anymore. We were crying for a long time and I NEVER cry. I realized how much this girl has meant to me these past few years, I've never been this close to anyone. So, she took her things and left and started kinda living apartment to apartment with her friends closer to her job. Just a few days later she said she wanted to work things out and she needed to talk with me, so she came over and said she would lose weight and wouldn't stay out with her friends all the time. We got back together for ONE DAY and then she told me she was sorry but she made a horrible mistake and couldn't promise those things she had promised. I was enraged and yelled at her a lot for making a promise and breaking it a day later (after we had sex, etc, etc). Finally, she left again. I was going through hell in my mind, regretting past mistakes and wishing I could have kept things together. For the first week whenever I saw something that reminded me of her I would break down. It was harder than I ever thought possible. I kept going through crap and just when I thought I was getting better (a week ago) I realized that "I love this girl" and "I want her back with me". I then called her and we agreed to meet. I told her that I was sorry for everything and I really wanted to work things out. I spilled my guts on the ground and exposed my beaten black and blue heart to her. She said that she couldn't do it and that she would rather be closer to her work and hang out with the girls like she used to. This just sucked. That was last night. Now, I am a little hungover and am sitting here entering all this sh** into a computer enotalone thing in hopes that someone that even gives a rats ass will email me and tell me what the hell I should do. I should move my ass on, right? So, how do I begin with that? What is healthy? I have spent too much time alone this past month, but I don't like people much and don't feel like any of my friends really care about this. I told a friend last night, but it's not like anyone really knows exactly what I am going through, well maybe someone out there in internet land. Anyways, help me out ya'all, I could use it. Thanks, alone in this huge empty apartment, radiofoot