Leonhart

Thank you all for all the congratulations and good wishes!! I am 23 and even though I know that is young, I don't feel young, at least not too young. There is nothing more I want in this life than to marry the one I've always dreamed of and have of babies and have a big, happy family of my own- my family and childhood were not the greatest. When people say, "what are you thinking?" they say it in more of a joking manner but I still don't understand why marriage is equal to doom these days. What's better to celebrate than the coming together of two people who really love each other and who can't envision their lives without one another??

You're not THAT young. Maybe compared to the overly high and elevated average age of both sexes getting married now, but it's not like you're 18 or something. That would be different.

I completely agree with your vision of matrimony, but sadly, not all share this idealistic view. I've learned how to just either: a) ignore people when they trash marriage and family life or b) rebuttal them to the point where they don't dare say a word about it when I'm around. I love to argue. lol

Once again, congrats!

Hiya Wilhelm ? Kev ?

I thought I recognized your avvy pic!

Welcome ... back!

 

Cheers,

Ellie

Main reason why I threw the pic up there, it's not 'cuz I'm so full of myself. Not yet, anyway. lol Moved it to my profile now. It's better off.

Thanks for the welcome... not that I went anywhere. The old account was inactive for six days before this one got started, so I was on a six day hiatus. Not a big departure.

Hey there, I've been with my GF for two years now. I'm very devout (Roman Catholic) and she is a deist of sorts. I recently have been considering becoming a priest, (I'm taking Philosophy/Theology in University). But today I was posed with the question "Who do you love more, God or me? I couldn't answer and it got ugly. My GF now is not talking to me because she's upset that I could possibly abandon her for someone she believes doesn't even exist.

 

What do I do? I don't even know if I WANT to become a priest, I was merely considering it, but now my relationship is on the rocks.

She's not even your wife and she already demands first allegiance? Okay. Even then...

I would've answered and let the chips fall where they may. But it probably would've been the end of that thing (relationship, that is). It's a rather childish question anyway: It would be like your girlfriend asking you, "Who do you love more: Me or your mother?" lol What kind of question is THAT?! And being jealous of God? Come on. That's technically one battle even I wouldn't bother to fight. What's the point...?

You need to decide what you want to do. Is this girl you've been dating for a long time the most important person to you, or do you really want to become a celibate priest for your whole life?

If you're just soul-searching, fine. But it sounds like your time is limited and taking too long to decide could be a problem. I think you REALLY have to be serious about your decisions before deciding to become a priest. That said, it sounds like you may not be ready for that. Priests don't date. Hell, maybe I should become a priest...!

Frankly, nah... I won't even go there. Do what you feel is right, pray about it, if you wish. Good luck and God bless.

Nah, online dating is not for me.

Nevertheless, your exhortation is welcomed.

I wasn't counting online dating, that's not really meeting people, per se. Not until you actually meet together in person. As for church, not everyone goes, of course, and those who do, should not be trying to pick up men/women. There are numerous other (and better - i.e. more appropriate) places to meet someone you may or may not want to date.

In school, you encounter literally thousands of other young people, with similar goals, plans, etc. Nowhere else in life will one have that same magnitude of opportunity.

And as one gets older, the chances increase that more and more people you meet will be taken.

-The Mall - This is where I've had a good bit of success, meeting girls in stores that I shop at, whether they work there or shop there. It kinda sucks for me because the places I shop (AE, A&F, Hollister, etc) have some pretty snobby girls working sometimes who, for some reason think they’re better than you, the customer, and that doesn’t make a very good salesperson if you ask me, lol. But for the most part they're all very attractive so I deal with it. I try to make it a point to go to a mall once a week or every other week, regardless if I’m actually going to buy anything.

Then they should be fired. If you're in sales and can't even be friendly and personable, you should be working elsewhere, and not with people. That kind of attitude is bad for business.

I'd have to disagree with church, though. It seems disrespectful to go to church to pick up women. That's not its purpose in any way, shape or form. I'd say anywhere else is fine, but not church.

That's odd. College removed any inhibitions that remained, lol. Isn't that the point of college, other then the education?

One would think so.

No freakin' way!!!

 

Wilhelm is Kevin T?

 

But Wilhelm enjoys reading, and Kevin T does not.

 

They are both INFPs though, but Wilhelm is so nice and Kevin T has a major chip on his shoulder...

 

I'm confused.

lol

I'm not sure if that is an insult or a compliment.

I don't know how "nice" I supposedly am. Some people may not agree, having read my posts about university life.

In truth, if I don't seem very friendly here (or anywhere) it's due to being preoccupied, too busy and frustrated with my love life (ahem, lackthereof). Otherwise, I'm fine.

Either way, I am who I am. I think I could stand to be nicer, but when your life sucks, it's hard to pretend, so I tend to be a little sour. I think most people are aware of this fact, when reading my posts.

And frankly, IF there is a change seen in me, I take it as a good thing. It shows progress, change and improvement. That is always a good thing.

Swearing profusely.

I'm not saying I never let something out that I probably shouldn't, but it's another thing to talk like a character from TPB.

I like being touched. Sadly, it never happens, so I become miserable and bitter. lol

Aww, poor me. Who cares? lol

Anyway, I think it's okay to flirt using a little kino, just don't overdo it. Girls will respond positively (IF THEY LIKE YOU!!!) to touch on their arm. That's it. Try elsewhere and you may forfeit your hand. lol

I remember a while back, a girl kept touching me, who I thought liked me. Turns out she did, she told her friend who told me and later that week, I asked her out and we dated a bit. It didn't work out, but it was a definite sign of interest. So if a girl ever touches you, it means she likes you. I'm serious and yes, I'm being general. I believe this is universal... unless the girl is a flirt (hence, the term).

I'd rather be just at the recommended weight (or maybe a couple pounds under) than be overweight, personally.

But I also understand that for some, being overweight is hard, just as it is for us to be thin. It works both ways.

Hey, can I join in...? lol

I hate being single, too! It sucks... All your friends exclude you from going out with them as "couples!" You get lonely all the time!! You fall asleep alone, wake up alone... damn it, you might as well die alone! It's crap. Total crap!

Being alone is unnatural, unhuman and nonsense! I hate it and don't understand how anyone could EVER want to be uninvolved with another person intimately!! Seems almost... alien, to me! But whatever...

Bottomline, I hate it!!!

There, all done.

Smoking is a huge turn-off. I would immediately dismiss someone who lit up, no matter how attractive she may appear. It's so gross, like kissing an ashtray.

metabolism is bs. you can always eat a bunch. and i'm not talking packing down crisco.

Uh-huh...

I'm confused. Do you mean...? I don't know what you mean, to be honest. lol

In any event, yeah, I can eat whatever I like and don't gain a pound. It's kinda nice, actually.

If his metabolism is really fast, he won't be able to. If not, hey, then by all means...!

Well, we all know the correlation between eating chocolate and craving "the bad boy."

Well, I'll start to flirt then.

And then I'll STILL get smacked in the head. lol

You could do it like Stuart Smalley in his Daily Affirmations, an older SNL sketch. He'd always say:

I'm good enough,

I'm smart enough,

And dog-on-it, people like me

lol

That's what I always think of when I hear the word affirmations. Does anyone else remember this? (Hopefully someone will.)

Anyway, I guess they might work. I don't know. I'd think stopping the negative talk is good, but I don't see how you could simply stop the negative self-talk without replacing it with positive self-talk. It is impossible to just shut the mind off, so might as well replace it with positive stuff. Easier said than done.

Poking on the sides of the waist is a pretty common flirting tease, at least where I'm from it is. (UK)

 

But anything more, YMMV I think...

So, you mean to tell me, if I decide to go up to a girl tomorrow and put my hands on her waist, she's not going to smack me...?

I've never heard of a woman accepting touch on her waist with a guy she just met. Hmmm...

That's pretty personal too. As much as hair, I'd say.

Maybe she just didn't want to seem rude, blathering on about something no one wants to hear about.

I wanna know what you said. lol

I remember back last year in social psych, they had a diagram which showed the different areas of men and women's bodies and the regions were colour-coded by preference (or none at all) each sex had for being touched, by friends, lovers, and strangers.

If I remember correctly, women only moderately will accept the touch from a strange man on her arms. That's it. Her hair, face and head is completely off-limits, until dating. Sorry.

Men, interestingly, were much more open. It even showed a guy did not mind being touched on the leg or thigh by a strange woman! lmao

It's true, to an extent too. We're such base creatures.

I think it's such a waste to not date during the college years. That's what it's there for! That said, it's probably why I'm so miserable. Having someone great would only increase my interest in academics, not detract from it.

I just don't think they're on the internet.

Wait a minute! I'm on the internet...?! lol

Never mind.