Leonhart

Do you have a respectable study to confirm that opinion? If not then how can you be so sure?

 

I don't know why enotalone doesn't have a mandatory "back up your "facts" with evidence policy"...

As I said, it is sad (but true) that I actually have to cite my damned posts.

I think I remember why I said I was leaving before, when I posted as Kevin T. Sorry I came back.

(See? Men can be emotional too!) lol Bah.

And if you really want a source, go do a search or pick up any simple text book on human biology. Geez.

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love."

- 1 John 4:18

If you're not fearful, scared or anxious, then disregard that. You say you are anxious when you don't know the outcome - but this would be different, yes?

You almost sound scared about it.

I think you should do it, Dako. lol Go for it! Carpe diem! You only live once, and all that nonsense.

Amen, Dako!

Even despite the pain it brought me, I am grateful to have experienced it just once. It was... nice, for all its glitz, glamour and brevity. I miss it... lol

Ah, another reason comes to mind: Women mature a few years quicker than men, so that would play a factor. By about 3 years or so.

Well, would your answer be any different if the question was "What if you died without ever having a wife?"

it seems like she is just a nice coworker. the fact that you think she is attractive makes you think she is flirting. if this was some unattractive coworker, would you be reacting this way?

While this could be the case for Byron, this isn't necessarily true. Sure, some people may see things how they like, I can't count the number of times girls I am not attracted to flirt with me. I wish they didn't. I hate it. It grosses me out, to be quite honest. But I try and be nice about it. *shrugs*

I love how people say, "you can't trust body language, etc." Is that honestly true now? Why do so many people write books on it? Why do women's magazines tell women what to do (and not do) to "get his attention?" Why do some psychologists say that over half (arguably up to 80%) of our communication is non-verbal?

Yeah, the only way you'll know for sure is if you ask her. But even then, she may just accept to be polite and cancel later. She may even go out with someone out of pity or desperation. The truth is, you will never truly know what is in another person's mind and heart. We can only go by what people say, do and don't do. I don't see how looking for signals is any different.

Be a cold day before I ever waste my time and do a cold approach by asking out some random girl. A cold day; Lucifer will be wearing a parka making snow-angels long before THAT happens.

That said, if you really like her, just go for it, Byron. The others all agree that asking her out is the best choice. I wouldn't worry too much about it being at work... unless it is a messy break-up, then you could be in trouble, working with someone you can't stand/can't stand you. That would definitely suck.

Then, he could go for it NOW. I'm just saying the law may look down on that. Personally, I see nothing wrong with it, but I am not the law.

Absolutely correct. You're a wise lady.

And the peg analogy, beautiful! Sounds like something I'd say. lol So true, too.

there is a girl who's 17 in the same state as I am and she likes me and I'm 10 years older than her

Do you like her? If so, you could wait till she turns 18 then go for it. Just a thought.

May not be her picture. lol

I saw that, hence the word 'ex.'

Probably just an expressive person. I know guys who talk the same way. I love Pepsi. But I don't want to have sex with it. It's just an hyperbole, an exagerrated way of speaking. I hear it all the time, from both sexes.

That is why I re-edited my post.

After a certain age limit, it starts to get a little freaky. I'll admit, I tend to like younger girls myself, but I don't know what a 30 year old woman would see in a 70 year old man, aside from a meal ticket.

Well, if you're not with her anymore, I wouldn't worry about it. Hopefully the next girl won't use the "L" word as much. lol

Evolutionary reasons. Greater status, earning power, confidence, some women even like older looking men and find them sexy.

It's not just girls wanting older men. Men also like younger women, hence the bond is strengthened by both sexes wanting the same thing.

Oh, I just wanted to add that I'm talking a FEW years older, say 5 or so, not 20+ years older. That's less common, and almost always for monetary reasons.

That's the American way!

Congratulations!

Wish you guys all the best!!

Society is anti-marriage, in some respects because of the ever-high divorce rate. 50% of marriages end in failure in the U.S. That's crazy! Some people are anti-marriage because of anti-religious views, some because of the traditional gender roles, some simply because they are bitter because they can't find anyone.

Don't listen to them, and have a great life with your new husband!

Good luck and best wishes.

See, what would be regretted is NOT having a transient girlfriend, relationship, but not having a real wife that will stick through anything think or thin and grow old together and a family. These are things that one can say they are 'missing' something from, but a quick-fix relationship or girlfriend, that's just a band-aid idea, I cant see myself regretting not having some transient experience.

I agree, but Luke... you can't have a wife without first having a girlfriend. You can't have a family without going on some dates.

Unless we're talking arranged marriages, of course. lol

Unless you raised up some great kids, showed others how to have a great marriage like you did and blessed others greatly as a couple, better than you ever could have alone. Then your relationship with a significant other will have lasting results.

And just what is so wrong about WANTING to be in a relationship. Is that such a bad quality?

Of course not. It's perfectly normal and anyone who says otherwise, well... I'll be nice, so use your imagination. lol

One thing though: You don't want to be seen as desperate. There is a difference between being desperate and wanting a mate. Totally different. As long as you don't come accross as overly needy, clingy or desperate, you've nothing to worry about.

I've been in the same position as you, for years now. It sucks, and I too get extremely depressed when I'm not attached to anyone. People were designed to be together, being alone, just isn't normal. Some, it may not bother, but for people like us, it's not the case.

After so long, you get discouraged, you start blaming yourself, questioning yourself and wondering what it is that you're doing wrong. But becoming introspective is good. It helps you see potential problems and areas for improvement with one's self. Chances are, you may not be doing anything wrong at all. I don't know you at all, so I can't really say if you are or not. But often we blame ourselves for things that are beyond our control.

If there is something you can do to fix things, then by all means. But sometimes we need to have the serenity to accept the things we cannot change.

For starters: Where are you looking to meet men? Are you active socially or not so much? Do you go to school, work or out often with friends? Do you dress to attract or do you secretly hope no one will notice you and hide in the corner? Do you expect men to approach you, if not, why? Do you believe in yourself and expect the best in life? Do you smile, look friendly, fun and approachable? If not, consider changing that - I know I would never approach someone who looked mean.

I'm not negative at all about most new things.

Randy, from Trailer Park Boys is a good example of a potbellied male. I'd post a pic, but I don't want to scare anyone. lol

Anyone from Canada SHOULD know who he is. And if you don't - you suck. lol

Unfotunately most girls prefer the outgoing type, I'm still waiting to meet some girls who don't need that kind of flashy personality in a guy. I'm not really looking for that type of girl either, just one who is fun, sweet, and REALLY likes me

 

And I hope you find someone like that, as I'm sure you hope as well.