hurting101

Thanks everyone I have not heard off him today, which has surprised me but im very relieved because I know I am okay if I dont hear off him. Its just when he comes back apologizing etc that I start wondering what to do. But right now im busy, happy and really think what you all said is true. If my friend told me her boyfriend did what mine has done, I would tell her to run!! Who tells their partner they will cheat just to upset them?! He did text back hours later to say he wouldnt, but by then it had done damage and really hurt me. How can you say that to the person you love? Makes NO sense to me!! Well thanks again and i will keep posting to let you know how i get on!!

Thanks Betterkarma. I had a good nights sleep and have a busy day today so will keep busy! Im sure i will hear off him at some point. Im going to have to be strong! Thanks though for your advice! Ill let you know how things are going!

I want to break up with my boyfriend. That is what you first said. It says it all. Its scary breaking away from someone you care about and cared about deeply, and it hurts. But 'time is a healer' and you will move on. If you were 100% happy you would not be saying you want to break up or doubting your relationship. You are starting college soon. A new life and you will meet lots of new people!

Ashley Reading what you put made me immediately say 'no you will find someone' so i guess im answering my own fear.! WE WILL FIND SOMEONE ELSE!! He is the master of sweet talking, wrote me a 'promise poem' about how he promises to do all this stuff, came with flowers it really was incredibly sweet. But then this other side appears when he is mad due to a argument. And its not a nice side at all. Like lboogie says enough is enough. Im getting stronger and stronger as the night is getting on (been about an hour but i have stopped crying and actually feel postitive!) Thank you so much for your advice it has made me feel so much better.

Llboogie I think youre right. COld turkey it is. Its going to be so tough. I know i can do it (i did it after nye but foolishly took him back 1 week later) Its just hard, I really did think we could work and have a life together. Now i know its impossible he will never change. Or he certainly needs to deal with his issues. i know he went through the same thing with his ex, she left after 1 year because of his nastiness.

I never even see him at the weekend he works in a nightclub for extra money. When he wants to be nice, he is so sweet and caring. Its just times like this when we fight he takes it too far. I have never experienced this. SOmetimes his nasty words dont even shock me. ANd that scares me! Im just worried I wont find anyone, Ill be alone... I guess everyone has that feeling though when they are breaking up

I am not his savior! I do feel guilty, I really feel for him he has had a lot of bad stuff happen to him and i really felt that i could bring him into my world of happiness and love. But I just dont think i can take the hurtfulness anymore. It happens too often. Its not what I want for my life. Can i see myself with him in 10 years? No. Or if i am, i can only imagine that the nastiness has increased and i just take it.

Thanks Lboogie. Yes we have probably broken up at least 3 times. And argue all the time. He gets very defensive. Im no angel but i find it hard to communicate with him. I sometimes don't say if something is bothering me because i know it will result in a big row. Im just worried in a few days he will start texting, emailing, turning up saying all these nice things and i will give in because its the easiest thing. I want to be strong and move on. Guess I need to kick myself up the backside and do it, as hard as it..

Yes I thought you might say that! I know its what I need to do. He has big money problems and i have leant him quite a large amount. I really tried to make it work, I knew it would be hard trying to work at it but I really cant take it anymore. Its so hard because I feel bad for him as I know he has had a tough life. When he apologizes I find it hard to say no and he always says the right thing. one week later its back to square one though... arggghhhh

Hi Betterkarma We have been together about 6 months. Yes he has pretty much been this way all the time. The last argument and break up was NYE when I was left with no plans at the last min and we ended. Its always the same, we fight, we break up, I get lots of nasty messages, he apologizes adn for some reason i think we can work it out. He says he has anger issues and really wants to work on it and have me in his life. So i gave us another go. Now its happening again. Its like a vicious circle. And now he is texting me apologizing...

Hi Betterkarma

Hi everyone Well im so angry and hurt right now I really need to write this down and get it off my chest. I just had a huge row with my boyfriend and resulted with him texting me alot of hurtful messages. He works in a nightclub and decided to tell me 'he is going to sure have fun tonight lol' and how he will wear a condom. It really hurt when I read that, and I guess its my main reason for typing on here as I have no one to talk to right now and I could do with an ear! He said it was over in text (we were fighting and i thought he was just venting) but now I don't know what to do. Tomorrow he is likely to come crawling back with some apology of how he didnt mean it. But right now I don't think its good enough. I will spend the night feeling sick as I do right now. He does this frequently, when we argue he says hurtful adn spiteful things and I ignore it. But its getting hard, and I really dont know how much more I can take. We have broke up many times now (only been togther 6 months) and each time its always with me reading nasty messages. Any advice. I guess Im just upset and needed to talk this out. Thanks for reading.