meeka

I cancelled my followup appointment with my counsellor today. I know I shouldn't have or i should have rescheduled but I didn't want to. She said I had to do NC with this guy, (casual sex relationship only) and alot of the stuff she said was just badmouthing him. She could only go by what i told her about him and when i went home I thought about it and he's really nice and its not his fault that i wanted more. So when he contacted me I started thing with him again, but although he started contact I am not sure what he wants or if he wants to talk 2 me at all. Anyway I had a few bad moments before when I wasn't doing anything and I was thinking how messed up I was before him, not about relationships or anything just confused and stuff in general. I was thinking that maybe he has absolutely nothing to do with anything and I was just using him as an excuse for all the problems I used him to hide. I don't know anymore, I guess I never did I don't know if this makes any sense at all. So I am talking to this guy again I asked him for NC but he did contact me. I'm not sure if he understands how hard this is for me and I know that he might have thought I wanted him to and was using it as an attention seeking thing(I have done similar things before) and maybe it half was. I honestly didn't want to talk to him but I wanted him to contact me. I also cheated with NC because I wrote something about him in my blog that i knew he would probably read the day after I ignored his first txt message.link removed Then he said on msn the he new I wanted to talk and he did 2. But I was online and when I did get it contact with him it was back to being about sex. We have hooked up another time since and have talked a bit on msn but i am not sure what he wants or what i want. I can't go back to NC without talking to him because I know he will contact me and thinking about it and half waiting for it defeats the purpose of NC. We have gone 3 months without talking b4 but that was because he lost my number. I know he was/is using me but I have been using him too!! He knows me pretty well probably more than anyone else but I know he is getting confused by what I have said. He told me to stop talking in riddles the other day. But I don't know what i think what i want so how can i tell him.

Sorry if this seems a bit harsh She thinks she might be bi, being she might like girls and guys. That is not a reason not to go out with you its like saying no I won't go out with you because I might meet someone else she likes. I'd say she is either scared of getting into a relationship(maybe for herself, for u, or for your friendship could be any reason) or she used it as an excuse because she didn't want to go out with u and she thought it would hurt u less. You could ask her if she likes you and tell her that it doesn't matter if she's bi. Unless she thinks she might be a lesbian it shouldn't matter because her liking a girl wouldn't hurt u any more than her liking another guy. I agree with Momene about not having a threesome but it also something that if u do get together and u r both cool with it, maybe somewhere down the track u could.

I know but he keeps contacting me and it makes things worse when I try to ignore his emails and txts. I don't have any friends, not really anyway, maybe that is part of this as well, I don't really know anyone I knew before him, I'm scared of what will happen if he does go away forever just as much as if he doesn't.

For about(more than) 3 years now i've been on and off hooking up with a guy, most of the time he's been in a relationship with someone else. Just casual sex. We have both said its over several time but it never is. I think I'm in love with him but am not sure, I know I was but now I'm not sure if its just a combination of habit and addiction. I can deal with that. What I have trouble dealing with is the way he drops me an picks me back up again whenever he feels like it and I can't stop it. I want it too be over completely but I can't say no, maybe cause I'm scared of missing out. I've tried to tell him it has to stop but either he doesn't understand or doesn't care. Last time it was a month between the time it ended and started again. I can't stop myself thinking about him. I wish I could, it makes it harder because I don't know if I believe it will ever be over. I don't want to live my life like this but I can't help it. I just want him gone from my life and my thoughts, and not to come back. Does anyone know how I can do this. P.S. I have never been in a relationship with this guy only casual sex. I sort of asked for a relationship once but he didn't want that and I don't think I really did either.