kickeddown

How do i get through this, i hate all this pain and agony. WHy does it have to be this dang hard! I didn't sign up for this!

Well, I saw the ex today. As I was driving home right when I turned onto the main road that leads to my house she popped out of a side street(we live probabaly three blocks away from each other). We waved at each other as I passed by her car. It really put me down seeing her. I miss her so much, I hate not talking to her, its so painful all the time. It never seems to go away no matter what I seem to do. I put on a good face when in company of others but I hurt so bad when I am alone and thinking of her, I can't help not thinking of her. I wish I had someone to pass thetime with, I have come to terms with not having someone but I feel so alone and down! Having that special someone to come home to and laugh with, hug, kiss, and spend time with is just so damn awesome! As much as I wish I could just be angry and be done with it, I can't hold bad feelings for her; this makes me still want to be with her someday and I know I still love her!](*,)

I have been doing okay for the last while, but the last few days have been hell. All I can do is think of how bad i miss her and want to talk to her REALLY bad! I have no idea if this would do more harm for me and also the possiblity of us ever getting back together. I have been strong and not talked to her for over a month now and counting, is this good? I have heard that she can't really miss me if i am not gone right? My heart is just giving me a the wrath right now and it will not let up, it sucks! I can't just deny my feelings for her and I don't know what to do.

We are pretty much done, no break now. What in initiated me to get all of my stuff outta her place was when I went to get something one day she ended up telling me that she loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore. That in itself is a huge kick to the nuts! And on top of that had the audacity to tell me later on in the conversation that she still could picture herself with me for the rest of her life! * * *! One of the posts I read earlier said the whole "Im love you but i'm not in love with you" statement is pretty much summed up by "I wanna go hoe around for a while and know that I will have you as a backup plan in case things aren't as good as I think they will be". Pretty much have to agree with that one, what a load of crap! What do you all think?

I don't really know, it would definetely be different(hopefully in a good way in that she has figured herself out and knows she wants to be with me). THat is the only way it could happen because another one of these bull**** breaks isn't going to fly! I don't want to accept it and am trying very hard to move on because I know that would be best. The hard part is that her family absolutely loves me and I love them. I'm like an Uncle to her sisters two daughters. They love me to death. I'm am putting my head up though and gritting my teeth until this bull**** feelings go away. Its hard to go against what your heart tells you even if you know you should!

Hi all, I came accross this forum a while back(about two months ago when my ex girlfriend and I broke up). It started out as she wanted some space, we lived together for two years while we were both going to college. I just finished in December and she is still going. She just turned 21 in November and I am 23, we were together for three years. We got along great for the most part and I love(d) her with all my heart since the day i met her. She decided in January that she didn't want to live together anymore. This was fine with me I thought it might do our relationship some good, but when I said that I didn't want to see other people she got mad and said that I was trying to control the "break". She said that if it was meant to be it would but if we were going on a break that we needed to take a real one. This hurt alot and now she is dating someone else although she says she is not. I have access to her email so I pick up bits and pieces along the way(which i wish i never knew because ignorance is bliss but i can't help it). I have been trying my best to get her outta my head and go out and keep busy but somehow she always keeps creeping into my mind. I decided about three weekes ago to go and get everything that i still had at her new apartment (didn't have anyroom to put it at my new place) to cut all ties basically. I haven't talked to her since then. When I called to tell her this she seemed surprised, the next day when i called her to tell her what time I was going to come over and get everything and she started crying(not bawling but i could hear it in her voice). When I asked her why she was crying she denied that she was and it progressively got more noticeable. I know she still cares because of that but otherwise she is really stone faced about it. I think that she is just trying to be strong and not let me know that she is hurt. I still love her, even through all the crap that has happened the last couple months. I wish she would come back but I know that it will not be anytime soon. I always wonder what she is up to and if she is doing okay. I'm tired of hurting and tired of wondering, please help!!!