greendots

On 5/28/2024 at 5:20 AM, Batya33 said:

Same -also if I had to teach an adult basic manners or why it was disrespectful to cancel last minute/show up very late without an emergency -  that was a dealbreaker for dating with potential for a serious relationship and if it was someone I was getting to know as a friend I then had boundaries as far as not risking my sparse free time making plans again to meet in person - I'd limit it to a group situation, a situation where I had to be there anyway, etc.

Ditto. Unless it's an emergency, you don't merely cancel plans last minute It's very disrespectful.

On 5/17/2024 at 4:54 PM, Alokinga said:

"We should go out again sometime!"

This wasn't very direct, so no wonder she replied with maybe. Direct would be: "We should go out again sometime. How about next Saturday?" Or "I'd like to go out with you again. How about I contact you during the week to set something up."

She doesn't seem to be friend zoning you. Most likely, just mirroring your level of interest.

Also, not all relationships start with a bang. Some are built with time, by getting to know the other person slowly but steadily. It's all about moving forward/progressing.

Oh, as someone who used to be the queen of overthinking... don't. It's your greatest enemy.

Looking presentable, I strongly believe, is something you do every day. Every day you show up at work, you dress appropriately for work. Not just on that first interview. Why? Because work matters to you. Why not be like that in your own personal life? Don't we matter?

Does it mean that jeans and t-shirts are out? Or that we have to wear make-up every day? Of course not. Dress according to the occasion, and whatever you wear make sure clothes fit you, are clean, and you smell nice.

Be yourself, but aim to be the best version of yourself!

It's important to look presentable. Especially when going on a date. I mean, would you dress badly for a job interview? No, you wouldn't. You would wear clean clothes that suit you well. You would make an effort.

Guys that don't make an effort are definitely not my type. I don't dress to the nines, but whenever I'm out and about I make sure I look presentable: clean clothes that fit me and are in good condition.

When you look good, you feel good for sure. Plus, it's about making an effort which showcases to your date that you take care of yourself. Pretty sexy in my opinion.

If this guy is into you, and was honestly just busy, you'll know over time. Meanwhile, so glad to hear you gave this a shot! 🙂

Woohoo! Congrats, Captain! 🎉

I'm stumped!

Is he an influencer? If he were one or worked in that sort of field, then he may have wanted to pursue someone who's like-minded.

Still, just what the?!

Sorry for your loss, Tinydance.

She isn't being straightforward with you. As suggested above, unless she wants to get back together with you she shouldn't contact you you.

Devastating! Stay safe y'all. Thinking of you xx

Red flag.

You could argue that living with someone's family is financially wise as getting a property or renting is getting more expensive. BUT

It's one thing to earn very little and therefore not being able to save. It's quite another to have a well paying job and carelessly spend money consistently. Yes, it's his money so he has the right to do that.

Bottom line: If his attitude towards finances doesn't mesh with yours, you might want to reconsider the relationship.

My friend is an overly chatty person, like she really needs to talk. She usually has something to gab about. Reality is, I sense that long silences seem awkward/uncomfortable to her thus she feels the need to express herself continuously.

Whereas I love some quiet every now and then. I find that enjoying each other's company in silence sometimes is very beautiful.

She's got ADHD so I must learn to cope with who she is.

19 hours ago, lilyyyyyyyyyyy said:

anyways he dedicated me linger by the cranberries and there is a light that never goes out by the smiths, what does that mean?

That he's got great taste in music! 😁 Romance is in the air? To die by your side Is such a heavenly way to die [...] To die by your side Well, the pleasure, the privilege is mine *swoon*

He seems interested. Ask him to meet up for ice cream or something. See how that turns out.

Sorry for your loss, Kwothe.

2 hours ago, Amandatorimeating said:

I decided to go and give it a chance. 

Glad you're giving him a shot. Whilst I believe intellectual compatibility is highly important, it's best not to judge a guy due to his texting abilities. A lousy text conversationalist could be quite the thrilling enthusiast when you personally meet him.

Have a great time on your date!

Depends. If you're fun, engaging, flirty... all the vibes of potential romance... then not kissing them early on would generally not deter a genuinely interested guy. But if your vibe comes across as friends-like then not kissing your date would evidence lack of interest.

As this thread has proven, there isn't one right way for a man to show interest towards a woman he fancies. We are unique and have different preferences as well as dislikes. It's how he makes us feel that generally determines whether we like him or not.

Anyone's best bet: be the best version of yourself. At the end of the day, trying is better than not having tried at all.

18 hours ago, psycho magnet said:

How short are we talking about? Even just, say, one small exchange in the grocery store?

A pleasantly brief conversation is fine. Definitely beyond hello. It's all about mutual attraction (looks are subjective) and connecting with a potential date.

Echoing others here. It's all about connecting with a potential date.

When I interact with a man, no matter how short, we are connecting. Provided it's pleasant I'll be happy to receive his number or give him mine when asked.

Giving my digits to some random man I've never even spoken to or, worse yet, seen in my life is highly unlikely. I'd have to be incredibly attracted to him somehow for it to work.

Remember that a 'direct' approach whilst efficient ignores one key detail: we choose whom to give our time and attention to based on how they make us feel.

Awesome news!!

Happy New Year, lovely posters! ☺️

Merry Christmas to all in this wonderful forum! 🤗 Be abundantly blessed

Firstly, happy belated birthday VeryMisunderstood!

Some observations from my experience:

• True (close) friends and family members (who care) will make time to celebrate your birthday with you, no matter how busy they are. They may only show up for an hour, or they'll suggest an alternative date to spent time with you. Even if it's just to grab a coffee or go for a walk.
• The less amount the guest has to spent, the higher the chances of them showing up as not everyone is happy to fork out X amount for a celebration. Still, those who really care will show you in other ways how important you are to them.
• Acquaintances or "friends", in looser terms, may be more lax about attending a birthday of someone they aren't that close to. Therefore, they may also not feel the need to RSVP.

Glad you had an awesome time on your day! 🙂

Awesome, Lost! All the best 😁

8 hours ago, niceknowingyou45 said:

I am starting to calm down a bit and am reflecting more on other people's points.  I agree that moving forward it is best to continue to be civil to his mom and let this go for my fiance's sake. I will apologize to my fiance for putting him in a tough spot and I will back off on trying telling my fiance what he should and shouldn't do regarding his mother because that is for him to set the boundaries as long as it doesn't directly affect me.

Really like what you wrote here. I wish you all the best! 🙂