detroitlove

I have a strong suspicion that my ex is already dating some other guy. We were together for 3 years and for over a year we would talk with certainty about marriage and our kids, about where we were going to live/do etc. In 1 weeks time, she said it was over. As most of you, this completely caught me off guard. Following about a week of intense pain, I began to accept a few things. You know, she made the mistake, her loss, etc. But then I began to really look forward to the call or email from her saying she made a mistake and was sorry, I thought she would come crawling back to me. I thought I would get great satisfaction telling her, "nope, sorry, you had your chance", which would give her some of the pain she so brutally gave to me. However, now I have a strong suspicion that she has already found some other guy in her life, making her fall head over heels in his love. This is merely one, 1!, week after the most intense relationship of both of our lives. A couple days after she broke up with me, because I supposedly didn't suit her needs, many needs that is, I sent her email kind of telling her off, but in a very nice way, and at the end I included things like, 'I don't want to lose my best friend' kind of stuff. So, she emailed me back angirly telling me that I never gave her the things she needed in life, and how she's met people in the last 3 weeks that have given her more than me in the last 3 years, ouch I know. So after reading this, I called her and said, "answer me one question, is there someone else, like specifically that has given you all this stuff I never did?" And she said, "yes, but not in the way that you think". (Hmmm, what am I supposed to think). She went on to say (lie) that there was many people, not one, that made her realize what I didn't give her. At the end of the call I kind of believed her, yet, I couldn't pull myself away from the gut feeling that she wasn't being totally honest with me. I also suspect this from those stupid "away messages" on AOL instant messengers, which she always puts up. I have a screen name that she doesn't have, and block the one that she does, so she thinks that I'm not reading them. I know it sounds "stalkerish" to do this, but I guess I'm just really lonely, and have a need to know how she's "feeling" from those away messages. I'm kind of hoping that she's depressed, I mean, at least give me that. Her away message last night said, "…is it possible to fall in love so quickly, with baseball? (wink)", you know, like she's joking about the baseball thing, yet serious about the love part (the wink). So I read this and automatically presume that she was watching the baseball game last night with some guy that she finds f**@#ng charming, and questioning how she can fall so quickly in "love" with him. It's worth noting that this girl has absolutely no interest in sports. I know, it's not smart to check up on your ex like I've been doing, but I am just so damn confused about everything that I need something, anything, to fully understand why she did this to me, and have that hope of not letting go. I must remind you that this has all happened in a matter of one week after ending a relationship where this girl absolutely adored me. What I suspect my ex of doing is a complete slap in my face. It's like kicking me when I'm already down on the ground, telling me not to get up. I mean seriously, this girl expressed so much love for me in 3 years, and now she's already "falling in love" with some guy she's probably known for 2-3 weeks!? At least give me the dignity of being hurt because you dumped someone you loved. At least be moderately unhappy for "having to" end a relationship. At least think about our love we shared for 3 years. At least think about me. I think I deserve at least a crossing thought, not one that says "he never used to do this/that and this one does", but one that misses at least a small part of Me. I never thought I could hurt as much as I have been, but knowing that she is as happy as ever and "in love" with some other guy she probably doesn't even know, is hurting me even more. It hurts because she is completely disregarding what we had for 3 years in a matter of a week, and doesn't even bother giving me the dignity and respect I deserve after 3 years by at least thinking of me.

I have a strong suspicion that my ex is already dating some other guy. We were together for 3 years and for over a year we would talk with certainty about marriage and our kids, about where we were going to live/do etc. In 1 weeks time, she said it was over. As most of you, this completely caught me off guard. Following about a week of intense pain, I began to accept a few things. You know, she made the mistake, her loss, etc. But then I began to really look forward to the call or email from her saying she made a mistake and was sorry, I thought she would come crawling back to me. I thought I would get great satisfaction telling her, "nope, sorry, you had your chance", which would give her some of the pain she so brutally gave to me. However, now I have a strong suspicion that she has already found some other guy in her life, making her fall head over heels in his love. This is merely one, 1!, week after the most intense relationship of both of our lives. A couple days after she broke up with me, because I supposedly didn't suit her needs, many needs that is, I sent her email kind of telling her off, but in a very nice way, and at the end I included things like, 'I don't want to lose my best friend' kind of stuff. So, she emailed me back angirly telling me that I never gave her the things she needed in life, and how she's met people in the last 3 weeks that have given her more than me in the last 3 years, ouch, I know. So after reading this, I called her and said, "answer me this one question, is there someone else, like specifically that has given you all this stuff I never did?" And she said, "yes...but not in the way that you think". (Hmmm, what am I supposed to think?). She went on to say (lie) that there was many people, not one, that made her realize what I didn't give her. At the end of the call I kind of believed her, yet, I couldn't pull myself away from my gut feeling that she wasn't being totally honest with me. I also suspect this from those stupid "away messages" on AOL instant messengers, which she always puts up. I have a screen name that she doesn't have, and block the one that she does, so she thinks that I'm not online and not reading them. I know it sounds "stalkerish" to do this, but I guess I'm just so lonely, and have a need to know how she's "feeling" from those away messages. I'm kind of hoping that she's depressed, I mean, at least give me that. Her away message last night said, "…is it possible to fall in love so quickly, with baseball? (wink)", you know, like she's joking about the baseball thing, yet serious about the love part (the wink). So I read this and automatically presumed that she was watching the baseball game last night with some guy that she finds (PROFANITY DELETED BY MODERATOR) charming, and questioning how she can fall so quickly in "love" with him. It's worth noting that this girl has absolutely no interest in sports. I know, it's not smart to check up on your ex like I've been doing, but I am just so damn confused about everything that I need something, anything, to fully understand why she did this to me, and maybe, have that hope of not having to let go. I must remind you that this has all happened in a matter of one week after ending a relationship where this girl absolutely loved and adored me. What I suspect my ex of doing is a complete slap in my face. It's like kicking me when I'm already down on the ground, telling me not to get up. I mean seriously, this girl expressed so much love for me in 3 years, and now I suspect she's already "falling in love" with some guy she's probably known for 2-3 weeks!? At least give me the dignity of being hurt because you dumped someone you loved. At least be moderately unhappy for "having to" end a great relationship. At least think about our love we shared for 3 years. At least think about me. I think I deserve at least a crossing thought, not one that says "he (me) never used to do this/that and this one does", kind of stuff, but one that misses at least a small part of Me. I never thought I could hurt as much as I have been, but knowing that she is as happy as ever and "in love" with some other guy she probably doesn't even know, is hurting me even more. It hurts because she is completely disregarding what we had for 3 years in a matter of mere weeks, and won't even give me the dignity and respect of thinking of me.