trpyangel

I finally did it. I moved out yesterday morning. But why do I feel so aweful? I mean, I'm completely aware of how screwed up he is, and I've known for a while that I needed to leave, but after everything he's put me through, I still love him with all my heart. He says now that he sees how horrible he's been to me, and that he's going to get some therapy, and get a good job and get his own place (we were living with his parents) and that he's going to prove to everyone, himself first and foremost, that he is a good person, and that he can provide a good life for me/us. I know it will take a whole hell of alot, but if he can get some serious therapy and work through his problems, I might give it one more chance. I'm sure everyone will think that may be a bad idea, but I love him so much, and if things arent completely different it'll be over before it starts.

Ok, I'm not making excuses for him, merely further explaining our situation. These are things he does every day: Says 'I love you so much' at least 100 times, tells me I'm the most important thing in the world to him, says he cant/wont live without me, has a fit if I dont french kiss him, the list goes on. He has changed so much since we got together, he used to do alot of really stupid things (like drugs) and now he only smokes pot, which I know isnt good either but its alot better than taking 30 cough/cold pills to trip. So no one thinks there is any way that he/me/we could try to get therapy and fix things????

If this was your first time you're just like alot of other people. I dont know any girls that had awesome sex the first time. Personally, I think practice makes perfect.

I've tried to leave so many times. We arent married, but every time I try to leave he either hides my car keys, lays underneath my car if I can make it out there, or whatever he can do to keep me from leaving.

My Story is really long if I can get all of the details together. My fiance and I have been together for just over a year. Our whole relationship has been really screwed up. My previous boyfriend and I broke up, and my current fiance was his best friend, and we got together the day after my ex and I broke up. At first I was drawn to him, we were so connected it was almost scary, anytime I would go to call him my phone would ring and it would be him. Anytime we were together, we would be finishing each others sentances and stuff like that. Our whole relationship has been very intense, and so many things have happened since we got together. Last july he cheated on me, snuck out of the house while I was sleeping in his bed and had sex with this girl that lived nearby. I didnt find out about it until we had broken up temporarly, and he used that to through it in my face and make me hurt more than I already was. During the time we had broken up I was seeing someone I worked with, but I always ended back up in Dustins arms. We got back together after about 6 weeks, and things were better, but they've continued to roll downhill since he proposed last March. He controls pretty much everything I do. We live at his parents house (I'm 21, he's 19) and he currently doesnt have a job. The small town we live in is partially to blame for that. There isnt very many places to go in our town. But I constantly feel aweful about our relationship now. I drive an hour to get to work, thereforeeee with an 8 hr shift, I'm gone almost 12 hours a day, and he's sitting at home, obsessing about me. He's convinced that I'm cheating, which I would never do, but I think since he cheated he thinks I'm going to do it just to get back at him. After everything we've been through, am I wrong to want out of this? I know how great we can be together, but we havent even had a good day together in...well, I cant remember the last. I'd really like some input here. Let me know what you think.