Unsure what to do?

Ok... recently on different occasions, two of my good friends have told me the cut themselfs... one hasnt for 8 weeks but was on and off for a long time beforehand... and the other told me when i accidentaly saw all these cuts up her arm ... i asked what had happened and she told me about it.... the first one i just listened to what she had to say and then told her to contact me if she ever felt like doing it again...

Im not really sure if i have done enough.... and if not what else can i do...

You have to be very careful with how you help your friends, i think you have done the best thing - to be there for them. They need people to understand, talk to them, make sure they try and get over it themselves. It is something they have to go through themselves. They will only stop hurting theirselves when they don't want to anymore. Maybe you should suggest they talk to a counciler or something? Maybe an adult they trust.

I hope it goes well..

Hey 15and nervous, I think you did the right thing. You made a good gesture, but sometimes like tsunami said, they won't stop unless they want to. It's none of your business to have to try and do something about it. There are counselors and people out there, that are trained to handle that kinda stuff. It's not new to those people. Talk to them, if you find this bothers you. Goodluck

15yrsandnervous, I'd have to agree with the two other replies to you. You've done exactly the right thing in asking that person to talk to you if they think they're going to do it again.

I've been on the other side of this issue where I was the one cutting myself. As soon as I had a friend that cared enough to say "I want to know when you cut yourself" it was almost like a switch. I cut myself a few times after that and never told him, but it didn't last for very long before I stopped cutting myself. The reason I stopped was because someone voiced concern and caring for my well-being.

What I've found normally causes a person to cut themselves through my own experience and research that my friend and I did is that most people will cut themselves because they lack the ability to show their emotions. They don't feel an emotional hurt as most people would and they are afraid that not feeling this pain is a bad thing so they create a way to feel pain.

This should definitely be brought to a counselor's attention if it continues because the psychological issues behind this could be as simple as wanting attention to as complex as maybe some deep seated mental issues. But you are definitely on the right track with letting them know you're there if they need you! Kudos to you my friend.

You are a very good friend and they are lucky to have you! I have also been on the other side and also in your position. Neither of which is a fun place to be!! In addition to being there for them, I would urge them to seek some professional help. They may not be trying to kill themselves, but it only takes one wrong slip of the knife or whatever they are using. For me, it wasn't because I couldn't feel pain, as a matter of fact, I tend to feel things more deeply than most. It was that the physical pain temporarily masked the emotional pain I was in at the time. I managed to stop and have been free for about 18 years now. Counseling can be a huge help as is the loving support of family and friends. When my best friend told me she was cuttting and was also on drugs, I actually spoke with her mom after speaking with my friend. Some would say it was not my place, but I knew that I wouldn't be able to live with myself if she had died because of my silence. It's a very personal decision and I'm not saying that you should do as I did. I just wanted to offer you things from a different perspective.

I started to self harm last year. In January I stopped!

The reason, I thought nobody loved me. On top of that I didn't love myself! I was regularly angry with myself for feeling this way so I would scratch my skin until it bled. It never had time to heal properly before I'd do it again. My right arm is covered in scars! I've been on depression tablets for 5 years! I've also been seeing a psychiatrist.

The best thing you can do for your friends is keep their mind off cutting! Do fun things with them. Make them laugh. All of this will release endorphins into their blood stream. The more endorphins the sooner they get better!

Good luck and take care.

I have cut before, and my previous best friend started to cut. The way i mostly stopped was by people finding out, so i told her bf and he told other people, and now she hates me, and she just happens to b the "queen bee" of our grade, so i have no friends at my school anymore, I'm not trying to bring this issue to me, but I am trying to warn you to be careful of how you handle this