Need advice, I think my friend might be insane.

I have a weird situation and it's a bit scary.

First of all, my brother made this friend online a number of years ago named Jay and they were really good friends but never met in person. My brother just passed away about 2 years ago, so Jay started talking to me because he was really broken up over my brother's death. So from that day on I've pretty much been talking to him online every once in a while. He's gotten really attached to me and says he loves me and stuff, but honestly I only talk to him because I feel bad for him and I don't want to be another person to turn away from him, and it doesn't seem like he has many people to talk to anyway.

He's always been real emotional, extremely sensitive, and needy, and I think he mentioned he was bi-polar. I always thought he just had a case of sever depression. But recently his behavior seemed to be on the verge of insanity. He e-mailed me saying he was going to kill himself and he was rambling on and on, half the time I couldn't understand what he was saying because each sentence ran into the next, like he was typing in stream of consciousness. I replied saying whatever I could think of to deter him from doing it but didn't hear back from him until tonight.

The e-mail I got from him tonight was even more incoherent than the last, but what I got from it was that he decided to put the suicide off for a while, then he talked about how everyone betrays him and how they are or will be punished for it somehow. Then he started talking about how he was thinking about killing people, this part wasn't completely clear but he said he wanted to take his friends with him when he killed himself, and he mentioned stabbing other suicidal people in the back and laughing at their pain.

It seems to me like he has a lot more mental problems than just being bi-polar. I'm not sure what to do, I don't want to give him any personal information about myself and I don't want to meet him in person because I don't want him growing even more attached to me. Should I ask for his phone number or address and say I'll hang out with him sometime, then if he threatens suicide or murder again, just call the cops to his house? He'd probably know it was me so I don't know. I know a lot of you haven't been in this kind of situation but is there any advice you have? Thank you.

i am so so sorry to hear about the loss of your brother. my heart is with you completely.

as for your 'friend' i feel for him too. i had a friend that had to be put into a mental institution b/c like the guy you know she was bi-polar & i believe your friend is bi-polar. the girl im friendds with used to email me & it started off with an idea then it just would get lost in babbling letters, 1/2 phrases, run on sentences & thoughts that you can clearly see were not thought out in a logical state of mind. she always talked about bright colors....it was all very scary & surreal.

it broke my heart & worried me to death. she was getting heavily into cocaine & was depressed also due to a loss of one of her best friends. her situation was verrry clearly like your friend's. she too felt suicidal & abandoned with the loss of her close friend. my friends & i found that her mood swayed extremely rapidly & also drastically with the seasons. in the spring she would run off with random guys & get coked up & not care about herself & drop out of school. meanwhile in the fall & winter she would heavily concentrate & try her hardest & seemed to be happier & more focused. the poor girl was raped at least once in the 'spring mind set'. its terrible to hear that your friend is in a very difficult situation.

does he have family you can contact? b/c my friends & i contacted a very close aunt of hers & told her EVERYTHING!!! sent her emails she wrote that babbled about nothingness, voicemails, & really told her everything goin on in this girl's life. & luckily got her the help she needed. but the night she was instituionalized she had to be arrested by the cops b/c she was threatening suicide & locked herself in her bathroom for hours on end.

is there any other way you can get info out of him to a relative's connections? maybe out of casual convo you can get some names & locations w/o you being sneaky about it & let someone know whats goin on. b/c when someone seriously contimplates suicide, more then likely they will do it. or attempt it at least. i know this is a heavy burden brought upon you for no other reason then being this kid's cyber buddy, but maybe you are all he has right now & he is only being honest with you. so i think the best way to go about this is to contact someone to get him help asap.

-DG724

this is clearly out of your hands to deal with. you do not have the means & advice to help this guy fully. you can be there as a friend but he needs some serious hardcore medical assistance.

ps: how old is this guy? if hes under 18 maybe child services can step in somehow?? i really dont know...

-DG724

Hey, thanks for the advice, I'm really sorry to hear about your friend too. My friend is 20 I think so child services wouldn't help. I'll try getting some info from him in a casual conversation. Thanks.

Sorry to hear about your brother.

I'd try and get some information from this guy, like his address, and then send the police to his house. It sounds like there is a potential Columbine-like situation happening here, and you may save some lives by stopping it before it happens.