boltnrun

I understand why they monitor. They need to know their employees aren't secretly transferring information to anyone who shouldn't have it. And that's fine with me. I have personal devices I can use. My brother doesn't have a personal computer so he filled out his mortgage forms on his work laptop and then saved them to the company network drive instead of his hard drive. The company network went down for about a week, right when he was supposed to finalize his home purchase. He was practically hysterical because he couldn't access his documents. Secretly I was wondering why he did such a boneheaded thing, but of course I didn't tell him that!

If you do decide to move back, be sure to deal with whatever it was that caused you to leave first. Have a job and housing secured before you move. Reconnect with friends you have there. Have a couple months worth of money for expenses saved up. Also remember, geography doesn't solve everything. You have to go with yourself wherever you choose to live, so if there are things you need to work on emotionally or mentally moving away won't solve them. Whatever dissatisfaction you're experiencing also may not necessarily be related to where you live. It just might seem that way. And looking to moving back to NOLA as a solution to all your problems might not be realistic. Have you discussed this with your boyfriend, BTW? Do you plan to leave him behind too?

I don't either. My phone has data which I use even when in the office. And I only go to innocuous websites like Google Maps on my work laptop, even when I work from home. Just because they might not look at browsing history every day doesn't mean it isn't recorded and periodically reviewed. This is especially true if you deal with anything considered confidential, whether it's in the private sector or public, or you work on government projects (like I do). I don't do anything on my work computer that I wouldn't want my manager or corporate leadership to see.

If you connect to the work WiFi or network, every keystroke goes from your computer to the company network (where it's recorded) and THEN to the website you're using. They have a record of everything you do on it. Both private companies and government agencies. A former coworker used to send sexy messages to her husband (who also worked for the company). They were so embarrassed when their messages were read by IT and the in-house IT person teased them.

Do you use this site on your work computer? I would strongly encourage you not to do that. Everything you do on your work computer is recorded by your company's IT department regardless of whether you delete it or not. It's not just on your computer's hard drive. Anything and everything is accessible to them. I would recommend you use your personal cell phone (like I do). Secure and private.

Some of the people in Supply Chain are trying to drag me into their processes. I do not work in the Supply Chain department and will not do any of their functions. They always say "we just want you to be aware of how the processes work!" which translates into them trying to get me to take over some of their work. Not going to happen UNLESS they give me a significant raise. Their manager just quit so they're scrambling but they need to address that within their own department.

What would happen if you get to California and meet a high powered career man who meets all of your desired criteria? Do you truly feel you'd resist being attracted to him because you have this other guy back at your previous home? If someone has to fundamentally change to be right for you, they're wrong for you. And that goes both ways.

All those nice things you think and feel and say about her? She probably thinks and feels and says similar things about you.

If you are successful in getting your deposit back may I recommend you choose a different destination? If you choose the same dates, destination and lodging she could show up and cause all sorts of drama.

You're still planning to take her on this vacation? I wouldn't expect any "good will". She can use the money as ransom to try to force you into reconciling. I would contact Air BnB and/or the property owner and explain the situation.

Do you have to get the money back from her or from the vacation destination?

So she's not even divorced yet but she was already on a dating site? Interesting. I'm glad she did you the courtesy of telling you. Now you can move forward. Oh, and I recommend being proactive about dating others. Don't wait around in case she changes her mind.

I slept better last night. Although I had another weird dream. I have some dreams that recur every so often. In this one I was driving the car I had before I bought the one I have now. I was driving up a VERY steep hill. For some reason I got out of the car and walked up some stairs, then had to retrieve my car at the top of the steep hill. I've had this dream before. Weird. Almost all of my dreams involve either leaving some place and driving or driving and arriving at some place. My family features prominently in these dreams too. But I'm grateful for being able to sleep.

No one can be "stolen" without their own consent. Plus, he had feelings for her before. You can choose not to accept the situation but it won't change anything. All your refusal will do is make you miserable, it won't bring him back to you. You're obviously educated and intelligent. Many men would want to date someone like you. But you'll never meet any of them if you insist on focusing on someone who doesn't want to be in a relationship with you and who is actually with someone else.

If she reconciles with her ex would you still want to stick around being her "friend"? Could you tolerate visiting their shared home? Or would it hurt?