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  • Paula Thompson
    Paula Thompson

    The Heart of Best Mates: Perplexing Advice for Coping With Unrequited Love

    When we talk about the concept of best friends, of souls connected on a seemingly unattainable spiritual level, our hearts might swell with joy. We may feel loved and whole, just knowing that our closest companion will remain loyal and by our side through thick and thin. But what happens when that same friend makes us feel something different, something complex and uncomfortable? What if we begin to feel something more – something beyond what we would normally accept from another person? Something that almost has the power to destroy a friendship?

    This is the situation faced by many when feelings of romantic love are inspired in them by their closest friend. Now, such romantic feelings might not always arise with passionate intensity and mutual knowledge. These feelings might instead peck around the outside of the friendship, making it difficult to cope with the changes bubbling beneath the surface. So, how does one go about handling such a situation effectively and with care?

    First, it’s important to understand the dynamics of the friendship. Is it a two-way connection, or is it more unbalanced, where only one person is feeling these intense emotions? Do both parties understand one another and share an equal level of commitment to the friendship? If so, this might make it easier to contain any feelings of unwelcomed emotion and express yourself with candor.

    Secondly, it’s important to consider the implications of acting on your feelings. How will it affect both of you and the relationship you have built together over the years? Will it be accepted or completely disregarded, ruining any hopes of salvaging the friendship? It’s best to explore these questions with honesty, wisdom and integrity. Make sure you understand the implications if admitting your feelings of love, not just in the moment but also in the long term.

    Thirdly, it’s important to remember that your feelings are valid, no matter how tangled and complicated they can be. Don’t allow yourself to be harmed by someone else’s thoughts or opinions on the relationship. Despite whatever repercussions may arise, you should stay true to how you feel, whilst understanding the outcome may not be in your favour.

    Lastly, it’s important to adopt a supportive attitude in order to ensure the preservation of your friendship. Seek advice from those who know you both the best and help to facilitate an honest discussion. Acknowledge the other person’s feelings and discuss potential solutions. No matter what decision is agreed upon, try to keep the bond of friendship intact without resorting to silence or distancing yourself.

    When it comes down to it, managing your feelings of love for a best friend can feel like a confusing rollercoaster that only seems to become more tumultuous with time. But one must remember that such a situation is understandable, if not altogether commonplace. It shouldn’t be seen as shameful or embarrassing, especially when there is a history of love and trust to be upheld. With the right advice and patience, any confusions can be eased and perhaps even a resolution for the many could be reached.

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