Reminded of my ex today

[warhuhwow]

My ex and I split nearly six months ago. She cheated on me and treated me like crap. After three months of trying to reconcile she cut contact. I pretty much worked to get over her. A month later, she came back with all kinds of claims and over the course of five days made me want her again before deciding it would never work. Now it's month later and I'm back to where I was: pretty much over her.

 

Things are going well for me. I'm in my final semester of university. In four months time, I'm going to work in the states (I'm English) for three months then travel around for another month. When I get back, I'll be moving to a really awesome city and doing a master's degree in something I enjoy. I even have a romantic interest to focus my attention on (I'm even slightly anxious to make a move/state my feelings because then I might be left with nobody to focus on).

 

I rarely think of my ex anymore. Today however, a friend was asking about doing apprenticeships and I told him that my ex did one. He said we should look at the website, so we did. Lo and behold, my ex was mentioned on there. She won an award for best apprentice. There was a picture and everything. I kinda wished I could tell her I was proud of her, as I know it would've meant more coming from my lips than anyone elses.

 

So now I've been a bit upset all day. I think it's just that I've been reminded of her, had a bit of a slip maybe. I'm over her in that I'm totally aware that she's bad for me, I don't love her anymore, that it would never work out. I'm still not over just missing her personality, what she brought to my life etc. But today has been difficult.

 

Last weekend I travelled really closely to where she lives to sort out my America job. I was tempted to go back to her town and look around (just for memory's sake, not to see her) but I decided not to.

 

I don't know if I want advice or what for this. I think I just needed to vent at someone. Any sort of reply would be nice though!

[AwdreeHpburn]

Hey warhuhwow - (great name by the way)

 

{{{HUGS}}}

 

I think you're doing amazing! You sounds like you're being really strong - and I say GOOD FOR YOU!!

 

You're looking to the future, making plans, trying to move on romantically....

 

Fabulous....

 

But its OK to have thoughts of her, memories, moments of weakness....That's all OK.

 

You just need to stay strong like you are and hang in there. The more difficult times WILL get less and less......

 

Where 'bouts in America are you going?? Do you mind saying?

[zerohalo]

Keep hanging in there. I've run into situations like that, like when I cook a meal that my ex and I used to cook together, or I catch the scent of another woman and she happens to be wearing the same perume. Memories come back, and they tend to blindside me. But, you get to the point where you realize you've got your life, and she's got her own.

[cantexplain]

yeah same thing happens to me when I see her around...

 

until I get over her it is best, for me, to avoid impressions or memories ...

 

I am reminded, however, of all my other, more distant ex's - and how, accross time I have been able to realize we aren't meant to be and seeing them or thinking of them or talking to them no longer sparks my heart in this way.

 

It takes time and distance.

[warhuhwow]

Yeah, I think you're all right. It's been a month since I last saw her, and everything is a bit scary at the moment: finishing uni, going off to another country for a third of a year etc.

 

Awdree, I will be in New York state working for three months, then travelling all over the states afterwards (I'll be getting a plane from Boston to LA and then making my way back to New York

 

Zero, I know exactly what you mean. When it came to me eating things I used to have with my ex, it was kinda difficult the first time. I don't know why that happens. There's still one particular dish that I haven't eaten. Haha.

 

Right now is the longest I've ever gone without any contact from her (even though I don't think of it like that). I think I'll just focus on this other girl I like even more - although I am scared that if I get rejected I'll have nobody to focus attention on and thoughts will wander back to my ex. Gah!