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New Years...


House

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Hey everybody...

 

I'm slightly hungover and I feel like crap, and I need to get something off my chest before I can sleep. Here goes...

 

Alright, so I have a good friend who is a girl (I'm a guy). We've been close before but never really done anything, but New Years eve, or rather the morning after, got me a little confused. We were both kinda tipsy, had a bit too much to drink and we were fooling around a bit. Anyhow, she was getting pretty close to me and wasn't quite going for the kiss. She asked if I wanted to and we kissed a bit. We were both tired though so it wasn't that super (my first real kiss too at 17. Yes I know, late for some lol, I've been saving myself for someone special). Then we slept and she had her arms around me and everything. We woke up in the morning and I felt like crap, so I got up and went inside for a drink of water. After that her attitude kinda changed a bit... she wasn't as huggy or anything. I don't know whether we only did what we did because she was drunk or what. I mean she was still plenty friendly and everything, but something didn't seem quite the same... just a gut feeling I got.

 

Other thing is that she has a guy friend that she messes around with at parties, but they're not an item. You know, casual drinking party buddies kinda thing. I'm wondering if she's doing the same thing to me, just a casual quick drunken fling and then back to good friends the next day when we're sober again like nothing happened. She's planning in having a party at her house soon, and this other guy will likely be there. But will she get with him and then I'll be sitting there thinking 'what the hell did I get myself into?'

 

Point is, I have had feelings for this girl for a while, they were once mutual a while ago and I have reason to believe they still are. We're great buddies, we have awesome chats and get along together great, but she confuses me. I don't know whether it's a good idea to to make something of it if it's just a one off drunken thing...

Iuno, maybe I'm reading into it too deeply, maybe I'm causing a problem where there is none. It's just really buggin me for some reason, I don't know why. My bed sheets even still smell like her and it's making me feel bad :S

 

Iuno... All I know is I can't sleep and I needed to put this all somewhere... Any comments are quite welcome, and you can tell me how buggered I am lol.

 

Cheers everybody and happy new year! (Yes we're long past it here in Australia lol).

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Woo another Australian.

Personally I dislike the idea of people having a hook up buddy or whatever ( buddies are much much worse)

It usually will always hurt one of them.

I'm guessing it was the alcohol. Maybe talk to her about it, don't just assume her thoughts or motives behind her actions.

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Woo another Australian.

Personally I dislike the idea of people having a hook up buddy or whatever ( buddies are much much worse)

It usually will always hurt one of them.

I'm guessing it was the alcohol. Maybe talk to her about it, don't just assume her thoughts or motives behind her actions.

 

Yeah I've been thinking of that... I was talking to her best friend about it. The girl was apparently gonna say something about it to her the night after but then said 'I'll tell you later' so I got to her first and told her what happened... So this friend is gonna talk to her for me cause I don't feel comfortable discussing it with her yet... too soon I spose for me, or else I think I'll make a fool of myself about it :S

 

I must say this though, at the time it did kinda feel special. Here we are, 2 really good friends and just having a blast with each other. Then we kissed and cuddled and slept and it felt like it was more than just drunkenness, at least on my part.

 

She's supposed to be having another party soon, maybe even as soon as tonight. If this other guy goes and they hook up again, I'm pretty sure that that will answer my question... How much could it mean to her if she goes and makes out with him again? Pretty sure I won't be going to that party in that case...

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Well I realised I made the biggest mistake...

 

I had a chat to her about it all... apparently I'm a great guy, but she thinks that nothing would ever happen between us and that the alcohol was probably the main factor in what happened. I don't think she knows what she wants... she has problems and I don't need those in a relationship...

 

*sigh* I feel like * * * * now... Everytime something like this happens...

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