I think my BF is going back to his ex....Help me Figure this Out

[missmar]

Hi

 

I posted a couple a weeks ago about my boyfriend was acting like a jerk after my cat died.

 

Well with the holidays things have even got more stressful. First let me give you some background about him. I met him in June and he just moved here from Florida in March. When he lived in Flordida he was in a seven year relationship with a women who had two kids. When they met her son was only 6 mos old. Well long story short...She cheated on him and apparently it hurt him tremendously...being that he was bringing up her kids not his own. He left and moved here to SC. Started a whole new life here. Totally no contact and I can only imagine he misses her kids.

 

Well he has this on again off again relationship with me, he tells me he loves me constantly asking if I love him, and I always reassure him. Then he drinks treats me like dirt and then I tell him to get lost...and the whole freakin thing starts over again... I love you, and then treats me like dirt.

 

Finally I told him yesterday to just GO! I have been losing weight with all the stress he has been puting me through. He at first got really nasty and I refused to fight with him and I let him say a lot of mean things to me and just agreed with him.

 

Then he calls last night at 11pm and says to me "I'm sorry that I treated you badly, I was wrong" I told him I missed him and wanted him to come over...it said he was on his way home and tired.

 

We talked about his ex briefly two nights ago when he was totally drunk...I asked him if he wanted to go back to her...he said he couldn't that he could never trust her again. But then went on about the kids and I can tell he was tearing up about it.

 

We had plans to be together for Xmas...but since all the fighting it has not been discussed. I now think when he called me he was feeling guilty and was probably thinking about going to Florida and spend it with her. I know that she was trying to get back with him a month ago....she contacted him and wanted to fool around with him....

 

Do you think he went back to her? She really hurt him bad....I don't know what to think

[robowarrior]

He said he's sorry so you have to forgive him. However the heart is like a mirror and reflects what people have up their sleeve. It seems pretty bad.

 

Remember small arguments can lead to BIG break ups, they act as poison to the relationship, ask yourself the question, am i with him so he can make me miserable, is he with me so i can make him feel upset? Of course NOT!, Couples are supposed to make eachother happy, not giving another spin to that wheel of hatred, if he starts an argument don't give in,nor start an argument EVER. It will only make the wheel of hatred spin forever if one argument follows another argument. Its important to realise that. Or in other words ONLY put love and light into eachothers lives. Remember you need to be like a castle gate , close yourself to bad people/things/events and open yourself up to good people/things/events, you don't want more garbage in your life then you already have. Trash out, diamonds in. Although you have to be carefull with what you consider trash.