Emotional Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I need help! My ex and I broke up like a little over a week ago. He hasnt contacted me once!! I dont really know whats wrong though, I want to call him, but im scared of the "awqard silence".... Im going to be going to a phyciatrist pretty soon because I have had relationship problems for as long as I can remember. I also have problems connecting with people, I mean everyone, even being around my bestfriend makes me nervous/shy, I dont know how to explain it. I feel like Im not all the way here...I want to known if anybody can help mE? warding off the aqwardness and just calling him. He does have my costume at his apt along with a few hair accessories, but they aren;t a must have back right away. I have his jacket still and I want him to have it back, it just hurts! He's been the greatest and all of the sudden its OVER=( kind of makes me sad, anyways, Im rambling and probley not making a lot of sense... Link to comment
Confused_kelly Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 All break ups are hard, even more so when we are not the ones that wanted things to end. What were the reasons for the break up? What was his attitued or aproach when you broke up? I know it hurts, its normal, just let it all out, and take it one day at a time. Link to comment
Emotional Posted December 19, 2006 Author Share Posted December 19, 2006 Before we broke up I kknew it was coming, Im actually the one to bring it up by texting him " I want this to work, but i dont think its going to" there wasnt a real attitude towards the break up...the jerk had the nerve to grab my knee and leg a few times during whatever blabbing he was talking about...he'd smile but it wasn't a real smile. I'm beginning to think I fell into lust with him over our intimate moments, because there were a lot and thats what we did the first time we found alone time... and from there he came over and "we" talked..but I invited him and felt bad that I had just taken some strong nightquill and had been on one anti anxiety pill and I had like two margarittas, so I wasn't in any shape for breaking up or mingling at all for that manner...All I wanted to do was work it out!!! I literally couldn't talk much, I couldn't think of what to say, kind of in a daze...I guess... the next few nights I kind of texted him, but I might of came off kikind of pysco I texted him saying hey u wish things were different, he didn't text back, so I texted again saying, its okay if you want to ignore me, it was fun while it last.. he texted, I wasnt ignoring you, i was sleeping, believe it or not... I texted him back saying...its ok, you didnt give me a reason to believe otherwise..or something and he texted back something rude, I was sleeping and even if i wasnt I dont need to explain myself to you=( It hurt so I texted back something crazy on the lines of karma's a beep...and he text a question mark? Sooo I dont know, i feel horrible...but i apologize too much and I meant it so whatever.. I sounded phyco, so now I dont even know what to do, hes probley questioning why the beep he cared or tried and is probley thinking im phyco lol...GOSH, this has gotten so complicated, I hate drama and Im causing it all...through texting of all sources...which is very weak on my half, I hate texting!! I know what you mean by take it one say at a time.... I cant stop dreaming and crying over him though, I hate eating and completley stopped going to the gym/tanning....Im so pathetic dude Link to comment
Confused_kelly Posted December 19, 2006 Share Posted December 19, 2006 When my boyfriend and I broke up the first time I was just like you, I seemed a bit psycho, but those were not my intentions. He actually pulled back because of that. I got some pride and started to think about me, and we are together now. Now Im not saying if you do that you are going to get him back. What I want you to get from this is, do whats best for you and it will end positively no matter what. If he doesnt come back at least you have your dignity left and a path to emotional recovery. If you push too much too fast, even if he wanted to talk to you he is going to feel pressured. So please, dont text him, or call him at least fro a week, let things cool, off, hey I know the advice sucks, I know how you feel believe me, I suffer from anxiety but its the only thing that helped me. In a week of no type of contact, try calling him, dont text, I know it may seem easier but just call with no expectations or interrogations. If you feel anxious during the week, come here, Im off from college so I should be around for awhile and you can vent and talk about it 1 Link to comment
Emotional Posted December 19, 2006 Author Share Posted December 19, 2006 Thank you!! You deliver very helpful and direct advice...It doesn't suck or anything, I'll try following it... Its been hard not contacting him, but I guess it'll help in the loong run. I guess I want to contact him a lot sooner because Im afraid of losing him completely and he is supose to be going back to his hometown for christmas/new years also=( Im just afraid and I am trying to keep a steady head, but its driving me crazy, knowing that he may end up finding a new girl.... Link to comment
Confused_kelly Posted December 19, 2006 Share Posted December 19, 2006 I dont think not talking to him for a week its going to make you lose him, as a prospective bf or even a friend. I know it may seem like that, but relax, he's not going to go off and get married in a week, and if he does, then that was not the guy for you. Forget about him and what he may or may not be doing. This is out of your control, you can only control yourself, so make that your priority, get better, think clearly and try to be as ocuppied as you can to get your mind off calling him. Link to comment
Momene Posted December 19, 2006 Share Posted December 19, 2006 If you've broken up, I'm afraid you've lost him already. Accepting that it's over is the hardest part and I've been there, seen that, got the T-shirt... Contacting him will only make it harder to let go. Link to comment
Emotional Posted December 20, 2006 Author Share Posted December 20, 2006 thats pretty rough Momene!! arhh, i k now what you mean though.... Its just going to get "better" from here=( nooo Im not like head over heels in love with him, but when we were together I felt like I could be one dayy...Just sucks... all my dreams of a good relationship have failed and it just doesn't seem too fair on my part, I may contact him before he leaves, I just want to be with him again... PATHETIC I know, but I dont know how to put it any clearer I miss him, want him, miss his touch and I just miss beinga round the fool...=( I miss his intendo also lol... Link to comment
Momene Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 thats pretty rough Momene!! arhh, i k now what you mean though.... Its just going to get "better" from here=( nooo Im not like head over heels in love with him, but when we were together I felt like I could be one dayy...Just sucks... all my dreams of a good relationship have failed and it just doesn't seem too fair on my part, I may contact him before he leaves, I just want to be with him again... PATHETIC I know, but I dont know how to put it any clearer I miss him, want him, miss his touch and I just miss beinga round the fool...=( I miss his intendo also lol... Sometimes those of us who've been round the block a few times really do know best. Accepting it's over really is the hardest part and I was carp at it. I could have got over my first marriage a lot quicker if i could have just accepted it. Link to comment
Emotional Posted December 22, 2006 Author Share Posted December 22, 2006 at least you were married...Im never going to get close enough to a person to be proposed to EVER! Sooo...whatever... I thought this would be a good place to set my mind at ease...but its in a way making me think more Link to comment
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