accidentally broke nc!

[marthamydear]

i dated a guy for 2 months, and fell hard for him. my feeling weren't reciprocated, however, and he broke up with me by simply discontinuing all contact (no break up talk, email, or anything). there has been nc between us for about 2 months now.

 

this morning i was on okcupid, the website where we met. after we broke up, i deleted my profile and created another, without any photos, so he wouldn't know it was me if he ever ran accross it. well, this morning i was on the site, doing a little stalking, or perhaps just lurking. i saw that he was online, and i clicked a link to message him, without knowing that just clicking it would actually send him a message. when i realized this, i freaked out and logged off. he sent two im's responding to my accidental message (to the effect of "hello?" and nothing more).

 

so, now he's probably looked at my new profile. he might not know it was me, but there is some identifying info (age, location, race, height, etc), as well as my favorite music and movies. there's a chance that he may not connect it with me, but i doubt it.

 

should i contact him over this and apologize for lurking? what could he be thinking right now? that i tried to contact him and just chickened out? or that i'm a creep who is stalking him? should i delete this profile in case he looks at it again?

[a2000]

Continue NC because you know that the two of you didn't/wouldn't work out.

 

I'm sure he gets lots of girls on his profile so he won't think much of it.

 

You should move on and forget about him.

[Survictor]

You knew when you accidentally contacted him. Be honest.

 

Just leave it and don't contact him at all.

[marthamydear]

yes, i was lurking, but i really DID NOT KNOW that i opened the chat thing just by clicking the stupid link!

[Survictor]

O come on? You already said you met him on there! You knew.

[nadine_3110]

Hey if she said she didn't know, she didn't know. I think that you should just let it be. If he finds out it was you, it doesn't mean you have to talk to him. You were just curious, but try to refrain from doing that again if you're really hurting over this guy. He sounds inconsiderate to not even tell you you guys were breaking up.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

i wouldn't worry about it... other than to stop lurking and checking on him... if he contacts you, just tell him you were online and noticed him and were just curious and clicked on the link then thought better of it... exactly what you did.

 

but i doubt you'll hear from him anyway... the guy took a powder (a very rude powder) and disappeared on you without so much as a goodbye... so even if he recognizes it's you, he's been there, done that. he's obviously on that website looking for someone new...

 

btw, why do you care if he sees your profile there anyway, and why are you trying to disguise it from him? are you trying to entice him to go out with you again by thinking he is dating someone different? i guarantee he'll figure out it is you when he shows up, and be *really* angry that you are playing games... and if that's not it, who cares if he sees your profile? he's obviously done dating you, so will just move to the next profile.

 

sounds like too much game playing to me, even if it is only in your own head and you think he won't notice.

[Survictor]

^^^^ agreed.