Boyfriend's brothers best friend

[GirlGreen]

okay so i have my boyfriend, who i absolutly love to death and he is so in love with me. even though we have only been dating for three months. but we see eachother every single day. usually we hang out at his house where you can typically find his brother and his brothers best friend. so i see them very often as well and they treat me like family and have told me how much they care about me. one time at a party my boyfriend and my boyfriends brothers best friend (who is pretty much a brother to my boyfriend) took me aside and his best friend told me how much i meant to him. and the thing is...i kinda have a crush on him. and in my dream the other night i ended up making out with him and i cant stop thinking about my dream! and it makes me question how much i want a boyfriend. and what if i am missing out on my chance with him because i am dating his best friends older brother!?

 

if it were up to me, i would date all three, my boyfriend, his brother, and his brothers best friend. WHAT SHOULD I DO TO KEEP MY MIND OFF OF MY BOYFRIENDS BROTHERS BEST FRIEND?!

[LostInMyThoughts]

Chances are if you leave your boyfriend, and go for his brothers bestfriend, this little 4-way will come to a screeching halt.

 

Your current boyfriend will probably not like you, and it's likely his brother won't like you either. So where does that leave his brothers best friend? In the awkward position of choosing you for the longterm, or sticking with his bestfriend.

 

Also, if a dream is enough to question your decision to be with your current boyfriend, you probably don't love your current boyfriend to death.

 

So, now that I've been a total jerk, to answer your question, minimize contact with your boyfriend brother's bestfriend. If possible spend more time at your house instead of at your bf's house.

[GirlGreen]

but really its not that easy. the dream isnt only one single dream. it just made me realize how i felt about him, which i sorta new anyways. i dont think i would ever leave my boyfriend for his brothers best friend, but if my boyfriend and i arent together forever, how could i pursue things, purhaps, with his brothers best friend in the future...or could i? without being a horrible person. for now i know i will deffinitly stay with my boyfriend, while still completely enjoying the company of his brother and his brothers best friend.

[itsallgrand]

This is normal, girl! You are going to be attracted to others whether with a bf or not.

 

It isn't surprising that you have a crush. Kind attention is always nice, especially at 17.

You CAN care about a male and like him without letting yourself fantasize about him in a romantic way: simply choose it.

 

Just realize that this is a nice little fantasy, not to be taken seriously. Like Lost said, imagine if you took this seriously and acted on it: You dump your bf, tell the bro you like him and want to date, and if he has any decency he will say "uh, NO. I care about you but not in a romantic way. Besides, I would never do that to my 'brother'"

 

You gotta choose if you want to keep seeing your bf or not. That should be a separate issue from this crush....this crush is nothing...doesn't matter how old you get, you'll have to deal with attractions and fantasies.

 

You can start to look at this guy as a brother, so that you can be around him without obnoxious thoughts coming up.

Literally, imagine in your head he is your brother! It works for me: what a turnoff.

 

BTW: You and your bf are spending a bit much time at his house with his connections....start suggesting other things to do. It will be fun, and less drama.

[LostInMyThoughts]

but really its not that easy. the dream isnt only one single dream. it just made me realize how i felt about him, which i sorta new anyways. i dont think i would ever leave my boyfriend for his brothers best friend, but if my boyfriend and i arent together forever, how could i pursue things, purhaps, with his brothers best friend in the future...or could i? without being a horrible person. for now i know i will deffinitly stay with my boyfriend, while still completely enjoying the company of his brother and his brothers best friend.

 

In this case, I really wouldn't worry about jeopordizing any chance you might have had with your bf brother's best friend.

 

It's not like your boyfriend and his brothers bestfriend are the only two guys left on the planet. If things don't work out with your current bf, there are plenty of other people out there.