breaking up because of the break up?

[staticcling]

i broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years today. we have had a bad history of break up/back together/ break up/back together during our relationship. The stakes are pretty high: we live together, I am in his son's life on a daily basis, and this would be the first year I would have spent the holidays with him. For all these reasons and more (too much to go into), I didn't want him to talk me out of leaving, which is our usual pattern. I decided to move out while he was at work and write him a dear john letter.

 

Now he is PI-Zisst. very angry and writing me a ton of very nasty hurtful evil texts about how i don't deserve children and how could i do this to his son. nothing about the relationship situation, just guilting me out about his son.

 

So in observing his reaction to all this i am seriously getting to know a part of his character i never discovered. it is ugly.

 

i love him and if certain things would change i could have seen us reconciling BUT NOW i am starting to wonder about him based on how he is dealing with the break up!!!

 

am i being harsh?

[annie24]

no, I don't think you are being harsh at all. you are seeing a different side of him - angry and violent. you don't need that in your life.

 

i think because you have a history of off/on, I would make this break permanent.

 

good luck