Stressed out

[natalie121687]

I don't know what is wrong with me but I always end up stressing myself out and worrying about things I'm not sure whether or not I should be stressed out about. For instance, I'm 18 but I feel like I've wasted my life not knowing exactly what I want to do for a career and I'm stressed out that I'm not making the right choice and that I'm going to fail at what I'm majoring in. I know a lot of people don't know what they want to do with their life at 18 but I feel like, I Myself, need to know or else I'm not going to be ok. I feel like at this point in my life I should be in a happy relationship with a loving guy that is going somewhere. I feel like I'm left out on being a normal 18 year old with friends, going out and having fun, because I don't have many friends and the ones I do have, don't have much in common with me. I'm stressed out about wasting time, days go by fast and then weeks and months and years and I feel like I'm not doing anything really productive I feel left out and I don't know why. I see other girls my age with more productive lives and I find myself jealous of them and hate myself even more for not being more productive, for not experiencing life as much as they have. Like I'm at an art institute miles away from my house surrounded by people I don't know who don't live anywhere close to me while other people I know are all living in a dorm together having fun in sororities and confident with themselves and what they are majoring in and I just get jealous like "why can't i be like that?" I just am so confused on what I want and I feel like I'm not good at anything and that I'm going to fail. I've always had high expectations on myself and if I don't reach them I freak out. I've come to the point where I just want to isolate myself because in my mind my whole life is wasted and I'm not good at anything and I just feel like giving up because everyone seems so far ahead of the game and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do.

[arwen]

Hey girl,

 

First of all, what you want in YOUR life has nothing to do with what others do. We all have our own way and walk in our own pace. Unfortunately, society is organized such that you have to make life choices early on- or so it seems. It may seem very important to major in whatever study will get you a job, but the most important thing is that you find out which direction you want to take. Going to college and uni does not mean you are making your last choice- after that you will start looking for a suitable job and that's a whole other thing!

 

You know, you're only wasting time if you are worrying and STAY worrying. What is it that you DREAM of? Don't compare to others-- what do YOU want? Are you in the right place in that art institute? You probably just started this term-- things are new for you, give yourself some time to get used to this. I moved 200 km away from my family and friends to work for my phd. It's been half a year now and I finally feel like this is going to be my new home. I have some acquaintances, but my real friends are still in my old city.

 

And keep in mind: the grass always looks greener on the other side. You don't know if other people feel more fulfilled than you do, or enjoy life more.

 

Ilse