Still hurting after 6 months since breakup...

[Delusion]

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[rightfromthestart]

my 2 cents

 

i hope this helps...see part of this post? therein lies your answer.

 

"to go yesterday and held back the tears while I was sitting in church and prayed to God and asked for his forgiveness and help aleviate the pain I have inside"

 

you don't need forgiveness from anyone - but yourself. and u don't even need to forgive yourself. if u just shift your focus, and reverse the negative thoughts to positive ones - you will be fine. after all, look at the big picture. did anyone die? are you smarter and wiser now than before? have u done things to improve yourself and your life? of course. so, be grateful. you made it thru all that.

[cheecago]

I was in a similar situation and I know how hard it is...

 

On the other hand, did he do something to cause you to act that way? I know my ex was very clingy, smothering and unsatisfiable in a lot of ways. Maybe thats why I had so much resentment.

 

Maybe try to look at it that way?

[motog]

hi, i feel for you you are hurting so much and after such a long time. I know how you feel onlly to well. guilt is an awful thing but also you only see it from your perspective. we often imagine ourselves worse than we were, in these times of trauma and self evaluation we focus on that until it eats us alive inside. only you and you coming to terms with it can really make a difference and i bet you havnt realised you are not as bad as you think you are. you admit you have made mistakes that makes you some person . there are people who never admit they are wrong and do the most dreadful things with no remorse. you are not one of those. so take a lesson from that when you look at yourself. loss is terrible , scars can be so deep and whatever it takes, get through, it seems never ending but you still have so much to offer by how much you want to make things right. you dont deserve to be in this pain you sound like youve paid your debts with it now , so take that on board. its hard to see an end to this road but your still here and there is . you have loved someone , be proud of that , we are all here to help you however long that takes and see you get there. you will.

stay safe

[Orlander]

Aw, Delusion...I'm so sorry you are hurting now. I can't tell you how many times I envisioned my ex saying and feeling EXACTLY what you are right now. I wanted so badly for her to realize the pain she caused me and the extent to which she broke my heart.

 

I could sense the pain and guilt it brought her to break up with me. I just knew one day she would truly regret what she did. For awhile I truly expected her to come back.

 

Now, after having several months with which to use to reflect upon the relationship I know that the break was for the best. While I still have fantasies of her coming back sometimes, with a changed heart and a realization that what we had was real love and with true acceptance in her heart, I know that my destiny lies elsewhere.

 

I don't know the reasons for your break, but you have to ask yourself if what you feel is real love or something less. Would getting back in touch with him be worth hurting him again?

 

I think I could be friends with my ex. I am that much healed at this point, but I know in my heart of hearts that I could never give my heart again to her. I deserve so much better than she was able to give. Are you willing to offer more than you gave?

 

 

Orlander