needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 OK here goes nothing. me and my boyfriend have been dating for 8 months tomorrow and i need to advice. Today's saturday and he wants to go hang out with his friends. They are guys but when i asked who was gonna be there he said that it's not my business..he has 2 old phones with all his numbers in them that he got from his old house and he said he just wants the pics off... Now his friend isn't a really good influence at all...every time we go over there together he talks my boyfriend into drinking. he usually holds back a little because i am there. he has this girl that he is supposudly hooking up a stereo for in her car and on Monday if took him 5 hours!!! to only connect the wires!! now he is going with her again today and hooking the rest of it up...she is a really attractive girl and i don't know what to do about that! his friend rob cheats on his girlfriends and i think he's going to invite girls over there tonight because i am not going to be there and i am afraid my boyfriend is going to get drunk and cheat on me.....WHAT SHOULD I DO????? Link to comment
SarahRose Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 He shouldn't have a problem telling you who he is hanging out with unless he is sneaking around. Do you know where he will be? Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 he said he was going to be at his friend rob's house and they were gonna have a guy's party.....only guys...... Link to comment
SarahRose Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 This is me, but I would show up there. Just stop by for a minute to say hi on your way to the store. Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 If i did that he would know what was going on....he would know i would be checkin in on him..and he said that he wants space away from me for a day because he is always seeing me but he works for 88 days and only gets off 2 days a week! i see him 2 hours out of the day when he works and i don't get why he needs space.. Link to comment
SarahRose Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 To me it wouldn't matter if he knew. My goal would be to find out if something is up. Another question. He actually said he wanted space away from you for that particular day? I would go over for 5 minutes and no matter what you find out leave in 5 minutes. If there are girls there, just leave anyway. You don't want to cause a scene. 5 minutes wouldn't be an infringement. Going over there and insisting you hang out too would be. If he didn't give you reason to be suspicious you wouldn't be wondering about it. Of course it is up to you what you do but do you want to sit around wondering and worrying about what he is really doing or do you want to find out? Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 Yea...i can find some way....what about this other girl he works with? the one i told u about in the first post...him and her hung out on monday to "connect a stereo" but now he is going over there again...they hang out alone... Link to comment
SarahRose Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 Ok I was under the impression she was going to be at the party? Help me get this right. Today he plans to spend time with her "connecting the stereo" and then later he plans to go to the guy party thing? He doesn't plan to spend any time with you today? How much time each week does he usually spend with you? Link to comment
theproman23 Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 Has anything happened in the past that makes you doubt your bf? Has he lied to you or has given you reason to feel like this? I think it's a bad idea for you to stop over there, I would try and find another way to find out what's going on. Do you know any of his friends you trust enough to ask to fill you in on what's going on? If you do trust him and he has'nt done anything before than you need to trust him again. Then again I would have told you who I was hanging out with and not been rude about it if you were my gf but that's how i am with my gf so i dunno. And the thing about the stereo it's not a surprise to me it took 5 hours just to hook up the wires, opening up the dash board and finding the wires themselves takes hours so 5 hours is a little longer than usual but it's possible. Be honest with him and let him know how you feel. Goodluck. Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 yes. he is going with this girl to connect her stereo and they he's going to have her give him a ride to his friend's house and she's "leaving" and they are going to have a "guy party". I spend about 2 hours each day with him except when he has off on sundays and mondays..then i sometimes spend the day with him when he isn't sleeping. Link to comment
annie24 Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 welcome to enotalone. it really comes down to trust. do you trust your bf? if not, break up with him. if you trust him, then know that he won't cheat. you can't babysit your boyfriend 24/7, and there are temptations in life. if your boyfriend is a standup kind of guy, he won't cheat, even if he is drinking and around bad influences. if he is the kind to cheat, he'll do so even if the hardest thing he is drinking is lemonade. do you trust your bf? Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 I do trust him somewhat but in the past i was cheated on and cheated on by others and now i am afraid...he drinks when we argue and he does it to piss me off and his friend does cocain and weed and i got him off of all that and i am afraid he is going to do that or he is going to cheat on me with another girl..i am also afraid that he is going to have that one girl stay instead of have he leave like he told me he would. Link to comment
annie24 Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 you are afraid of a lot of things that you can't control. your bf is not your ex. and like i said, if your boyfriend is a good guy, he won't cheat. and you can't watch him all the time, so either you trust him not to cheat on you... or break up with him. how old are you and your boyfriend? Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 i am 18 and he is 20 Link to comment
SarahRose Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 Has this bf ever cheated on you? Link to comment
needhelp17 Posted September 2, 2006 Author Share Posted September 2, 2006 well there have been cases of like 3 girls sayin they * * * *ed him but i dont get along with those girls so i don't know who to believe. when i confronted him he said he didn't and he freaked out about it. Link to comment
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