Really Moody Friend!!

[Third Wheel]

Okay, I've known this one girl, A, for 1 year now. We've been friends the entire time, and she's one of those extremely happy people. I am too, for the most part, so I guess thats why we get along. But, lately, starting in August, she's been acting weird and moody.

 

One week ago, around Thursday, she wouldn't talk to me at all. She'd ignore me completely when I asked her something or tried to start a conversation. Then, Friday (we had a afterschool game), and she had forgotten her shoes, so she couldn't play. She practically cried the entire time, and was depressed, so I thought, hmm, she needs a friend right now, so I tried to be as nice as I could, and tried to make her laugh.

 

Well, that night, she sent me an email. She told me she was having one of those days, 1/30. She also said stuff along the lines of "You're one of my best friends, thanks for always cheering me up and being you." This is one of the nicest things she's said to me, and I told her how great she was and such back.

 

So, for the past few days, we've been extra close, but today, she ignored me again. I walked up to her and said hi, and she turned around and started talking to someone else. I mean, I'm really talkative, so I'm used to being ignored, but there's atleast a sign of recognition, like a simple "hello." This is the second time so far she's just started ignoring me, and I"m not really too sure what I'm should do. I don't think she should be having one of those mood swings from the once a month days, because well, from what I know, it only happens once a month.

 

So, I don't know why she's ignoring me, and I don't really know how I should treat her in return. I really value her friendship, and don't want to lose it, and I'm not sure what I should do. If I give her hte cold shoulder back, I'd feel horrible about myself, because I can't do that the people (I should learn though ). But, I also don't want to keep trying to be friendly if she doesn't even want to talk to me.

 

Any ideas why she's got so many mood swings? And should I just kind of wait things out, and continue trying to be friendly?

[rose2summer]

I personally would not want to be friends with someone who is overly moody either.

 

Can you talk to her about it.

 

Figure out maybe if she has some type of hormonal imbalance.

 

Or certain stressors in her life.

 

If she is willing to change then I say keep being friends with her.

 

But if she is constantly a yo-yo, then you don't want her toxic friendship in your life.

 

Hugs,

 

Rose

[RelaxByWater84]

I had a friend like that and I gave up that friendship because it was too much drama. She would be nice one day and then the next day she wouldn't even look at me. I didn't feel like waiting around for her to decide whether she would be my friend or not. That's how I handled my situation.

[Honey Pumpkin]

Hi Third Wheel,

 

First off, you sound like a fantastic friend - we all need someone like you in our lives!!

 

Agree with above posters. One thing struck me, though, and this is just how I might feel - she might feel a little vulnerable and foolish for having opened up to you so completely, and her cold shouldering you might be an (immature) sign of embarrassment.

 

I would carry on being friendly to her, and see how things go for a little longer. Not being a walkover, but you know, not making a big deal for a little longer. See if this carries on. And maybe next time you're close, tell her that you find it hard when she is soooooo variable in the way she treats you; you try to consistently be a good friend to her, and you want the same back.

 

Good luck!

[heloladies21]

I can tell by all of the posts that you've written about her that you are really actually interested in her as more than a friend, but are trying to substitute friendship emotions for romantic interests.

 

It just doesn't work this way. You're just going to keep preventing yourself from either moving forward with her or moving on and finding someone else if you don't act on your feelings.

 

So do this, ask her out, make a move on her. Whatever you do, do something! Beause this "friendship" is only complicating things and her reaction is most likely out of frustration that you haven't made a move on her already.

[Third Wheel]

heloladies21, I have mentioned a friend I did like in other posts, but that was a different friend.

 

To me, A is just a friend, and besides she's dating one of my friends as well. I kind of introduced them and everything. But still thanks, and I don't think I like her as more then a friend, but now that you mentioned it, I'll have to think it over.

 

Rose2summer and Coffeegirl824, I've kind of kept thinking about just cutting her out, but everytime I try giving her the cold shoulder back, she'll end up acting extra nice, and I can't help but forgive and forget.

 

Honey Pumpkin, I've been doing what you just said for a while now. Like, continually being friendly, because well, thats how I'd want other people to treat me.

 

So do I just continue trying to be her friend, and wait it out?

 

And is there any chance it was just because of the once-a-month deal?