:( rebroken

[danman4968]

kristen says:

hey dan i been thinkin and i mean i guess there isnt no chance left

kristen says:

i still love you and care about u but i dont think im IN love with you anymore

Dan says:

kk

kristen says:

im sry for everything ok

Dan says:

yea yea yea

kristen says:

 

Dan says:

kk bye

kristen says:

bye

 

 

 

so there it is...the cheesy line i thought id never hear. what a way to start the * * * *ing day.

[Jayar]

Hugs... Well, you wouldn't have wanted to be with someone who wasn't IN love with you for the rest of your life anyway, right? You'll find someone who is!

[flower99]

I'm sorry. ((hugs)) Jayar makes a good point.

I'm sure you don't want someone who isn't IN love with you. So I guess these are the words you dreaded hearing, but also the ones you needed to hear to allow you to move on & let go. Than you can find that someone who is! (:

[danman4968]

i talked to her...she still doesnt know...she says she is unsure, she doesnt want to think so she makes splint second decisions to make it to where she doesnt have to think... trying my best to put her behind me...breaking no contact was a HUGE mistake...

[joyce1412]

how about this? you don't want to be with someone who isn't IN love with you, and you don't want to be with someone who tells you something that should be said in person ONLINE!

 

that was crappy. she should know better.

[danman4968]

i called her...she is so confused its not even funny...she is just putting this off...she wont talk to me about it...she just knows that she doesnt know. Its quite irritating to know that while im moving on, ill get a call from her and then ill be in for it again. I know how to start, but i have trouble keeping no contact after the first week 1/2 or so. Its tough, but ill keep at it.

 

It will take her a couple weeks or so to start thinking, i know how she is...but when she thinks both her and i know what she is going to do...its very irritating. Why would she openly admit she will want me, and does right now, but just doesnt want to think and is putting it off, she just wants to be left alone, which is what ill do. She just doesnt want to deal with all the problems our relationship has (which isnt many at all) plus the fact that shes slept with atleast 1 person multiple times (to my knowledge), so we will have alot to deal with. So i guess im wondering why she would tell me its over, no chance and she isnt in love with me...?????

[flower99]

i talked to her...she still doesnt know...she says she is unsure, she doesnt want to think so she makes splint second decisions to make it to where she doesnt have to think... trying my best to put her behind me...breaking no contact was a HUGE mistake...

 

Each mistake there is a lesson.

what doesnt' she know? You know she is flaky, uncommitted, not IN love with you & a coward (tells you online)....you can do better.

[danman4968]

trouble is i dont want someone better...atleast not at this point...i want to get through our problems and look back years from now and have a sense of accomplishment, and know that we stuck through it...

 

And about the "not IN love" thing, i am thinking she is just saying that so she can finally have peace, and not have to worry about this whole situation...

[danman4968]

what doesnt' she know?

 

She doesnt know what she wants...she doesnt know what to do...she just knows that her brain is burnt out on anything that has to do with me...she just needs some down time...

 

what gets me is why she would randomly come online 2 days after she said she needs a few weeks to think and just tell me she isnt IN love with me...

[flower99]

She doesnt know what she wants...she doesnt know what to do...she just knows that her brain is burnt out on anything that has to do with me...she just needs some down time...

 

what gets me is why she would randomly come online 2 days after she said she needs a few weeks to think and just tell me she isnt IN love with me...

 

maybe it took less than a few weeks to figure that out.

I know you want to work this out. And you want to look back on this and see all you guys went through. But she doesn't want the same as you.

And that's how to know she isn't the "one' for you. You can love someone with all your heart and have your life planned, but if they don't return your love or your vision, IT WILL NEVER WORK.

You need someone who returns your feelings, who is commited, who KNOWS what she wants and wants YOU! But instead you want someone who isn't giving you any of that...rather the complete opposite

Do what's best for you & find someone who values you

[LONESOUL]

Danman~ I'm sorry you are hurting. I am sure that right now you do not want someone else. Me either. I do not want someone else either. But the thing is

my ex isn't in love with me, she loves me, but she isn't in love, so I have no choice but to let it go, and heal and hope that someday my love, my in love love, will be returned, because anything less than that, will just be, well, less.

It took me 7 years to figure that out...3 of them with her telling me she loved me but was not in love...I stayed anyway, NO WAY i should have and NO WAY I would ever do that to myself again. Take good care.

[danman4968]

im still pretty confused, do you think she may just saying that to get me off her back? or what do you think shes doing?

[LONESOUL]

My ex was actually, finally,being honest. I am not sure what yours is doing Danman. But I wonder why we would want to be with people who could openly deny us what everone really truly deserves~real love. And I thought that was okay. I thought she would come around, she just didn't know she loved me, the way I loved her. That was not ever going to happen, and because I chose to hold on to those false hope for a very long time, I really caused myself a whole lot (and I mean a whole lot) of pain.

For me, I just want more than to settle for that and someone who would not cherish me, the way I do her.

[danman4968]

I understand...well...we have broke up before like this...i guess im just waiting for a call...because i know ill get it, i just dont want it to be too late. I dont know what she is doing either...so i will do my best to move on, and i suppose ill find out in time.

[LONESOUL]

I hope everything works out for you. I know that you are going through a hard time, just know that you are not alone, and that the hard times don't last forever...it will get better. take good care.

[danman4968]

Thank you lonesoul, i appriciate your kind words, i look forward to that time

[whoops]

you are 17 - she slept with someone else and she doesnt love you - those are the facts - so poirot make a conclusion!

[whoops]

young love that is why you feel so intense - cut your losses and move on it is the only way - find pastures new and stories to tell your grandchildren meet foxy ladies enjoy life you are young and dont need this heartbreak. good luck it is hard but you learn from it

[EternalHindSight]

Dan

 

I read your first post and so many memories came back, mine did exactly the same thing to me after almost 5 years of being together i got that load of ##^% reason i love u but im not in love with u anymore.

 

It cuts like a knife and u start to think u did something wrong, or worse still there is someone else. And then she will throw u a bone like im glad u called, or i want to be friends, lets catch up etc.

 

Dont fall for any of it, its just a way to alleviate her guilt over what SHE has done and also to hold onto a small part of your flame just in case she changes her mind.

 

U know what is worse, if u do NC she will make absolutely no attempt to contact you, and go on with her life as if nothing happened. Im telling u this so u dont beat yourself up over it cos thats what ive done for far too long. My advice is to run as fast and as far as u can from girls like that, delete her msn, her mobile number, box up all her stuff she gave u and get out of the house and distract yourself at all costs.

 

When they tell u that cheesy crap line they are only helping themselves, u did the right thing by saying bye and leaving it like that, mine turned into an argument and alot of regrets.

 

Best of luck, your definitely not alone!

[loveisaparadox]

Lots of good advice here.

 

And remember, you absolutely cannot control someone else's behaviour, even if that behaviour makes no sense to you. It's out of your control. Take a deep breath and really think about what that means.