HELP what does this mean?

[neva_black_n_white]

love hurts when u find d rite person, coz every feeling and emotion is amplified, dont crush me, could u imagine d pain id be in?

 

what could be implied by this?

confused

thanks.

[BazookaMike]

Crush me? Does she mean don't crush on her. To me this sounds like she doesn't want you, but here's an excuse to make you feel better

 

Or it could just be don't break her heart. She actually wants to be more and wants you to prove her wrong. So show her that finding the right person doesn't always hurt.

 

What context did she use this, what is your relationship with her?

 

Wait a second, did a guy say this? I think he's the type that gets way too attached when the time is wrong and has had girls break his heart before. He sets himself up for pain, but blames it on things other than himself.

[nexhial]

Devil,

 

It makes perfect sense to me even though i dont know who wrote it to whom. They are saying that to love someone like that is to have all your emotions and feelings at full blast non-stop, like a bolt of lightning.. and when they are crushed.. love hurts more than it feels good.

Love is a great thing... but when you are betrayed.. love becomes the worse feeling you can have. so they are saying, dont hurt them, dont brake his/her heart.

[neva_black_n_white]

thanks for the advice. i can understand both points of view on what it means and they do fit.

it was a guy who said it and like you said he does get too attactched, hes with me every second and then doesnt trust me with any of my male friends. i always seem to find possesive relationships so i'll get over it.

but that comment just stunted me and wondered what it meant i thought i knew but just questioned my opinion so i came to you guys.

 

nexhial it was a man and yes he is like that his heart has been broken and through that compares me and doesnt trust me. thanks for the insight.

 

jeremy i thought you hit it in one and i can understand most aspects from your views.

thanks for the advice then.

kel.

[neva_black_n_white]

soz the comment to nexhial was meant to go to bazookaMike. thanks.

[nexhial]

Could've just been bad food.

[neva_black_n_white]

thanks, it is an insight, i understand and respect his views just dont like the aspect of not being around my lad mates (most of my close mates are male i seem to find easier to talk to them). he doesnt understand this and as i come accross naturally flirty he thinks im going of with other people when really im not, im just being me.

 

isnt that what you would want? for a girl to be themself? i dont know i can work on it i guess, maybe im just giving up too soon.

 

like you said though even if she was to go with someone else you would still love her and thats the same for me, i do love him, i just dont think he knows that.

 

 

thanks.

kel

[nexhial]

One way to prove to someone how much you love them, is to give them total trust.

[neva_black_n_white]

yeah that did help thanks, i kind of talked to him about it the other day when he brought up past relationships and made a dig at me for who ive been out with, it seems that he is very self consious of if i am going to stay with him because i am good mates with some of my ex's. he realised how much it hurt me for what he said and the lack of trust and changed SLIGHTLY for me. he still worries maybe i can never change the way he feels.

 

i guess a girl cannot loose the reputation that he has labbeled me to be.

but thanks i see your pount, i only wish he could be as understanding as you.

 

thanks again

~kel.

[nexhial]

( I plan on making your topic the most replied-to-topic in the whole forum )

 

Well like i said, he needs to learn to trust you, regardless of your past reputation. Without trust, relationships are surely doomed.

What would he do if you left him based on the fact that he mis-trusts you and makes you feel bad? (drop him the hint, sometimes a guy needs a good jolt like that to make us think)

But i am sure that if he loves you as much as he does to get upset like this, that he can at least change his attitude for you.

 

Well, take care

 

-jeremy

[neva_black_n_white]

lol, carry on replying, we will beat it! thanks though your advice does help me, alot actually.

 

the thing is to me its not a reputation as i see it its just that before me he had only had one relationship and that was minor he seems to feel that thereforeeeee my count stand as a reputation it isnt it just mean ive been hurt so more god damn times lol. i dont know to me it seems like he never wants to realize the true facts, he doesnt believe me when i say i love him and he just hits a joke about others ive been with. forget about hints i might as well smack him over the head screaming it and he still wouldnt listen (well he would but wouldnt take it in).

he always talks about the way he doesnt love his family, he doesnt like to get close to people and his goal is to prove them that he can do better (he doesnt mean this in a 'big-headed' way just that they never give him credit for what he does and he believes everyone is watching in on his life, he says im different and that im his escape route etc. he tells me he loves me but doesnt acknolodge that i dont want anyone else.

maybe im just another piece to the puzzle hes trying to make, it seems to me he makes everything difficult for the people around him so that nothing affects him.

 

should i speak to him about this or would he justbe hurt by me being like everyone else. im fed up of him comparing me is it worth while. i dont want to hurt him

 

kel.

 

thanks

 

and i guess it is doomed because i cant see when hes going to trust me

[nexhial]

Sounds like a creep

[neva_black_n_white]

(lol, forget about the forum bet the entire record lol )

 

he does love me, or in some seemingless way that isnt too attatchable he attempts to set himself up to be ditched, in an attempt no to be hurt, not getting emotionally incolved and not acknoledging he is pushing that person away in the process. he does love me and i trust him when he commits in saying that theres just no trust he believes im going to leave him and im not i just dont want this to get to the point where i do it to prove him wrong like he does with others.

 

i couldnt see myself without him now that i have him he's...he's everything i want but doesnt have the self belief that is honestly his. he has so many great mates and family yet he feels he is trapped scared of the consequences.

 

i want to help him and like you said i should sit him down and talk about it...i guess i gave up last time, or thats what he thought when i explained how difficult i was finding it.....but i guess its not easy when you love someone it cant just be given to you, you have to work for it right?....i will tell him how i feel and that i am sticking with him.

 

thanks for the advice.....anything you want to talk about? because i seem to be spilling all my worries on you? sorry

 

anyway thanks for the advice and you must be a great person if you fit my b/f bill. lol

 

~kel

[nexhial]

Well, if he loves you, then he will be willing to work on this side of his attitude to make you happy.

[neva_black_n_white]

yeah i understand completely what your saying and i feel that you understand him pretty well (to a pin point even) he seems very much like you and from that it means that you are actually helping one hell of a lot im glad you dont mind listening because i can spill for hours trust me i can beat your 'basket case' lol, but i didnt get you with the suicide you ok? dont want to find out that you have done anything like that. scary.

 

i agree with you saying that he needs to work more on his self as he does lack in confidence i feel, and like you say he tries so hard to please others spites himself and then pushes the closest away. he tries to succeed for everyone else instead of himself, because i know he has goals set because he is a really good artist or drawer because he doesnt see that hes amazing with computers and stuff yet he does things to please others. he needs to see how good he is and work on this like you said.

 

how do you think i can help him? (i going on holiday tomorrow and he doesnt like the thought of that either-going without him, with a few of my cousins, girl thing i suppose) so i cant really talk to him that much...what if he has changed his feelings by the time i get back? i dont think he'll leave me but he may give up and we'll have to restart the whole process.

 

anyway i guess i will talk to you in a week and see what happens i guess....dont go through with that suicide comment please....you are a great person. and im sorry too that your ex didnt see that, did she nottry to make things work?

 

see you soon and thanks

 

~kel

truly greatful for your advice, keep it coming lol...we'll beat the forum.

[nexhial]

good gosh.......

[neva_black_n_white]

thanks you always seem to be able to help me (back of hol and still love him lol). neway i get your point on you saying it and the response being similar to what he would say i can agree with that and wow you two really do match up, scary but nice.

 

i will have to boost his confidence i just find it difficult, like him i would do anything for him and would be there at any point it just seems at times he pushes you away and then draws you back in just to make sure no-one gets hurt. i know im going to stand by him its just the advice i need on how to help this situation.

 

the 'holiday' was simple and i did meet people i guess but i never wanted to be near anyone else i guess i always had him on my mind. do you think i should remind him of how i feel....(i had no signal or places to go to call him whilst away so we only spoke maybe three times, and ive only just got back.....i want to call but i dont know he will feel, because of him slightly not trusting me).

 

ill wait for your advice i guess and it seems very much so that you are a talented person from what i here.

 

thanks for the help.

 

kel