What do you do when your ex goes from hot to cold...

[96GSX]

I've read other people having this same dilema, and I'm looking for advice.

 

I had a long and rocky relationship for a couple years. Eventually there was a big fall out, lots of emotional pain, and a bad breakup.

 

After a period of NC, I reach out and contact her again. At first she's excited to hear from me. Responding in a very positive way, inquisitive about my life and any changes that have been made. She even puts in effort to get together and see eachother again, but after a couple weeks of contact, and seeing eachother, and obvious hints that we still have feelings for eachother, the excitement slows down, then the communication slows down, and all of a sudden, she becomes completely unresponsive.

 

What is this? Why is it happening? And whats the best course of action?

 

Is she just stating to recall resentment again? What can I do about it?

[Dako]

She still likes you, but not like before.

She may even love you, but not romantically.

 

If she isn't up front about this, and is getting your hopes up, it's time to say goodbye for good, before you get hurt even more.

[96GSX]

Is there's a possibility that maybe she still does have feelings for me, but yet, since we have been together and broken up a few times in the past (all painful experiences for the both of us) maybe she just doesn't want to get hurt again, and because things were starting up again so fast she got scared/vulnerable and backed up?

[Loosing it]

Thank you so much everyone for answers. It means a lot to me.. It gives me hope yet breakes my heart. I decided for myself that all what I want is to get her back.. I'm ready to do anything to make it happen. I will change.. And I will prove her that I can be a better husband. I will live for her... I'm currently thinking of the way to get her back...

What are your thoughts?

[brando]

96gsx,

you say you are willing to do anything to get her back, sometimes that does include letting go. Sometimes it is the only way for two people to get back together. Tough road to travel down, best of luck.

[sadk]

I believe after most break-ups, if there is a way back, it's ebb and flow. It's hardly ever two people running at each other on the sandy beach. Hot and cold is the norm for two people re-establish trust.

 

Sean

[heartbroken23]

I wish I knew. I am in the same boat. My ex of 5 years (broken up 2 years) started to call me and text and write online on a way more frequent basis than usual. We were friends and kept in touch, but not as much as recently. We ended up getting dinner and watching a movie. Came to find out her and her BF are on a break and that she realized that she never trully enjoyed being single and got into a new relationship way too fast (about a month after we broke up and we were together 5 years). It was nice to hang out with her. Since then, communication from her dropped drastically. I really don't think it had anything to do with me, I know she is still into me and I honestky think she is just playing games now. She needs to be single though, she hasnt been in a while and she needs to learn to be alone. I won't be chasing her, if she wants to chill or hang out, she can make a move.

[96GSX]

Well, looks like cold went back to hot. She txt'd me today, "Hey u, long time no talk." and I ever got a call this evening.

 

Seems like maybe there still is a chance.