thick skinned? i cant do it

[dpressedone89]

I havent cut in about a year or so, i was really bad. deep and all over the place and lots of them. the other day i went to try and i couldnt. the pain isnt and issue and never has been really but i couldnt break the skin. i had my box cutter, (ive never cut with it before if that makes a difference) and i tried but it didnt work so i pushed harder, i had to push like i was cutting a box to get even a scratch.

 

so whats up with that and how can i fix it? could it have been a safety blade or has my skin thickened of something? i heard it softens when wet, is that a possibility, it just isnt working and i need help thank you

-stitcheS

[nottoogreen]

Well, from a technical perspective, you perhaps need a new blade as the old one may have been blunted as I do not think your skin is at fault.

 

That said, why are you here?

 

You should get yourself to do something. Focus on positive activities. I gave you links to websites. You can find others.

 

Write poems.

Draw artwork or a painting.

Make an icon.

Learn learn learn learn.

 

Whatever - once you look at that, you can say to yourself I did that. Post poems here. Link graphics to a post in Off-topic, we look at it and give you feedback.

 

You bloody have no reason to damage yourself on top of what others did to you.

 

You can do it, get going!

[dpressedone89]

ok well it was a new blade but its my box cutter for work so it could be a safety blade but i dont know

 

i have writers block at the moment

im gettting a new notebook and sketch pad tomorro

and im working on a painting but its terrible because its on the side of an old dresser pannel, i dont have a canvas lol

what you mean make an icon?

[nottoogreen]

You can do paintings and graphics with your computer. Research it!

 

Icons you can research too.

 

Keep busy!

[dpressedone89]

im trying to put my energy into my art instead of self destruction but its not easy when all i have is a pen no paper and a dollar and sixty three cents lol ill check into that stuff though thanks

-stitcheS

[nottoogreen]

Buddy, you need alternatives to what hurts you. Lot's of alternatives. You should keep yourself so busy that you have no time to think of anything negative.

 

Howabout ask google random questions whenever you are "grumpy". Can be interesting.

[PRSOV]

I agree with nottoogreen, if you sit around then your general attitude towards everything is going to become more and more negative. Find yourself active things to do, that will make yourself feel better in the long run, like small personal goals I guess. Anything that will stop you from thinking negatively and giving you a good positive focus on life... and positive energy.

 

Do you do much excercise? I find sometimes that does me a lot better than just sitting in my room making a model or creating a drawing. Keep your mind active non-stop!

 

The thought of you cutting your wrist with a razorblade is making me feel dizzy

 

We are here whenever you need to talk or vent, just please do not hurt yourself like this. It will not solve your problems in the long-term.

 

PR

[dpressedone89]

if it counts for anything, through my own incompitence i have yet to cut and i dont really feel like it anymore, what are some good activities ?

[arwen]

Two of my friends are ex-cutters. Both of them go running outside if they feel the urge. If you don't feel like anything creative, sports are a good alternative. I agree with nottogreen, about a more positive focus. It's difficult and I have to tell myself day-in-day out, but you can train yourself to focus in a different way.

 

If you find yourself in a low place, instead of cutting or looking for answers why you can't cut, etc, focus on things that REALLY make you feel better. Cutting doesn't make you feel better, it merely moves the pain from mental pain to physical pain. I am amazed how something small like taking a long shower or sitting outside in the park with a book can relief my anxiety and depressed feelings.

 

You are a very creative and smart boy, I have read your poems and I am sure they will help you to get rid of the bad feelings.

 

Ilse

[dpressedone89]

running is a great idea except its 3 am here so i cant do that now and i need something to help at the moment, thank you though and ill try that in the future

[arwen]

Haha, sorry didn't think of the time difference! It's 12 AM here! Anxiety can be at worst during the night. I know. I try to sleep with tv on if I can't sleep. Do you generally sleep bad? Because although it can be caused by depression, it also feeds anxiety and depression.

 

Also, enough exercise during the day will improve your sleep substantially during the night. Try to go to bed, and keep in mind that we're here to talk if you can't sleep! The forum still a better place than keeping the thoughts inside.

 

Ilse

[dpressedone89]

actually i rarely sleep at all, i have horrible nightmares so i choose to stay awake for days at a time, i try to get plenty of exercise but sometimes i lack. sleeping makes me want to self injure more so i avoid it when possible. i just need something creative to do

-stitcheS

[arwen]

You NEED your sleep, really. I would consult a doctor about your sleeping problems, because they can stand in the way of healing from anxiety and depression. I was awake for nights when I was depressed. I chose to stay up, because I dreaded the mornings so much that I'd prefer staying awake. I also have nightmares, especially in the times I was on antidepressants. I took temazepam for some nights, just to get myself out of the pattern of not sleeping. I had dreamless sleep on the meds, but they make you drowsy during the day.

 

Ask your doctor if you can use Melatonin. It's used for jetlags but also considered useful in depression. You won't get addicted to melatonin but it's not as effective as temazepam (Seresta) in the sense that it won't knock you out.

 

Ilse

[NKP]

Hey please dnt cut, i care and i really do want you to get better, i know you have been depressed for a long time but cutting doesnt fix anything it makes things worse. PLEASE STOP. love ya

[nottoogreen]

I hope today will be better and more productive and you find the time tonight to enjoy a nice sunset.

image removed

"Sunset" from link removed

 

Here are icons BTW

image removed

[Blured]

Have you had any therapy? Have you ever been on any anti-depressant medication? Have you ever gone to your doctor about this?

I would reccommend that whenever you cannot get back to sleep you have a cup of warm, sweet milk and read a book that you like. If you still can't sleep after a while, listen to some relaxing music, or take a warm bath/shower. For the long-term, try and develeop/find a talent. Anything sports related would be very beneficial as it would release endorphins; the chemical that is released when you cut. It would also tire you out and help you sleep, and add to your self esteem.

[dpressedone89]

Have you had any therapy? Have you ever been on any anti-depressant medication? Have you ever gone to your doctor about this?

I would reccommend that whenever you cannot get back to sleep you have a cup of warm, sweet milk and read a book that you like. If you still can't sleep after a while, listen to some relaxing music, or take a warm bath/shower. For the long-term, try and develeop/find a talent. Anything sports related would be very beneficial as it would release endorphins; the chemical that is released when you cut. It would also tire you out and help you sleep, and add to your self esteem.

 

i tried therapy and things worsened. ive been on prozac, zoloft, paxil, and 2 others, plus 9 anti psychotics for schizophrenia none of it helped it just made me sick and i was still depressed. my doctor just told me to lose wieght, funny thing is im 25 lbs underwieght lol

im not the most athletic person i tried martial arts it just doesnt help much because everyone there seems to have so much fun and im just trying not to off myself right then and there

[BrokenWingedFaery]

Do exercises in your room. Sit ups or something.

 

I'm a cutter too. Nice to meet ya.

[nottoogreen]

Do exercises in your room. Sit ups or something.

 

I'm a cutter too. Nice to meet ya.

My pleasure Faery, I have cut myself only accidentally during work but also with an electric bench saw which almost cost me my right index finger.

 

Exercise is quite nice and one does not need much but some space and oneself.

 

I am interested in helping young people with developing alternative interests and made some suggestions in this thread.

 

What is your opinion?

 

What other ideas do you have?

[BrokenWingedFaery]

Exercise can be addictive, and dangerous (I'd know...been there done that), but for the most part, it's ok.

 

I cut only when I'm alone irl, hence being around other people will delay it, but not stop it in the end.

 

I think the difference between a person who self injures and one who doesn't is that the first person see self injury as an option and uses it.

 

I'm ok with my cutting. I'm gonna get yelled at for that, I'm sure, but it doesn't bother me much. It's a symptom of the problems I have, not a problem in itself, for me at least.

 

 

dpressedone: I have terrible nightmares too. I tend to sleep very little.

[dpressedone89]

Do exercises in your room. Sit ups or something.

 

I'm a cutter too. Nice to meet ya.

 

nice to meet you as well.

 

that is actually the best idea ive heard so far, Im sorry to hear you dont sleep well either, nightmares are awful.

 

feel free to pm me if you want to chat, you mentioned you are ok with your cutting, how so? ok as in you accept it as an option or asin its under control?

-stitches

[BrokenWingedFaery]

*feels special that it's the best idea you've heard thus far*

 

Nightmares suck, flashbacks suck, yup yup yup.

 

I did PM you, but I'll reply here too.

 

My cutting isn't too much of a problem for me. I've never done permanent damage to myself, never cut too deep, and it prevents me from doing worse things.