how to proceed??

[izzycat]

I've posted earlier on this issue, but here's an update. I hang out with a group of people every week at this bar, and there's one guy who I met a few a few months ago that I see there. We're friendly, and initially I thought perhaps he was flirting with me (kissing my hand, he's very touchy with me...but he seems to be kinda touchy with other women he's friendly with too, soo...).Well, someone in the "group" knows him pretty well, and says he will NEVER initiate anything and that he's "gun shy" (he's in his late forties!)

I know that at the very least, he likes me on SOME level. His social skills aren't the greatest, so it' s hard to read him sometimes. last night we all went out and we played a game and we were teammates (we have been before too and enjoy playing together) and I said something like "you have to kiss my feet now" because I made good play, and He said "you now I have a foot fetish, so I may have to take you up on that...".

My friend has asked me how I want to handle it, such as have her say something or ask him if he' s intereseted in anyone or whatever. I dont' mean to sound all 7th grade here......but I just know how to take this to the next level, and I worry that asking him out or something will lead to my embarrassment, rejection, etc.....and I'd have to see him just about every week! UGh.

Suggestions??

[CamaroJoe]

Start playing a little hard to get. Flirt with other guys in front of him. And get one of your friends to talk to him and see if he's interested. And tell the friend that is going to be doing the talking to tell him, only if he's interested, that you are also.

 

But make sure he sees you flirting with other men as well. It works wonders...but from personal experience, don't EVER ask the guy out. A woman did that to me once and even though i agreed, it just takes away from the man's certain aspects of his duty, i guess? ....it's just strange. And plus if he's kinda 'gun shy' as you put it, it might freak him out a little.

 

Flirt when you are around him but make being around him sporadic and enjoyable. And make him kind of jealous in a non sleazy or slutty way.

[LostInMyThoughts]

Just ask him out for something low-key, like say a cup of coffee.

 

Rejection is normal and okay. It sucks, but don't let the fear of it get in the way of getting what you want.

 

If he's going to accept he's going to accept. If he's not interested, he's not interested. No amount of flirting, etc is going to change that.