An ideal amount to see each other?

[Insects Destroy]

recently i've been browsing the forums, and i seem to be reading the samethings and going through the same myself.

 

When starting a new relationship, it seems very hard not to see each other. Its good to see each other, but im thinking too much will lead to disaster as there wont be as much to chat about and it may feel a little boring.

 

I'm thinking its good to have at least 2 days a week to yourself.mates.family. It also feels good as you get to miss them and look forward to seeing them when you have arranged.

[Dating Coach]

You should be able to read how much you should hang out based upon her. If she is always wanting to hang out, then you can hang out more often, but don't be at her beck and call, and YOU make the plans, not her.

 

If you get the sense that she doesn't want to hang out as much, keep the contact and everything minimal. Set up dates for non-weekend days (because on the weekends you are all booked with the load of friends and plans you already have!) and hang out once a week or so.

 

You should be able to judge your hang out time based upon the signals she gives you.

[renaissancewoman101]

In my opinion, when you are first dating, like in the first month or two of dating, you should only really be seeing each other once or twice a week, because you are still in the getting to know each other stage. You also dont want to bore the other person and still keep the elusive mystery about you that gets them to want to know you more, date you, etc. After about two months of dating and if you guys have decided to date exclusively then maybe seeing each other more during the week is acceptable. Dont see the SO all the time and insist that he/she see you all the time since that is the fastest way for the relationship to burn out. Keep your own life too while you are dating or in a relationship. That helps to spice up the relationship and if the relationship does end, it gives you something to fall back on to help you get over the breakup.

[Sir Ulrich von Lichtenstei]

I see my boyfriend every day. My dad has been telling me since i first started dating (ive done this with all 3 of my past bfs.. relatonships last no less than a year - no longer than two years so far) that my obessive compuslive behavior is very unhealthy and that i need to spend time away from him. I dont mind spending time away from my boyfriend but whenever i do i just feel lonely (even if im out with girl friends). Things don't get old because we're also best friends. (though ive had some issues lately but i think i'm just being weird)

 

Every now and then we'll have a week were we're both too busy to really do anything together so we make sure we spend time together on the weekends to make up for it.

[RayKay]

recently i've been browsing the forums, and i seem to be reading the samethings and going through the same myself.

 

When starting a new relationship, it seems very hard not to see each other. Its good to see each other, but im thinking too much will lead to disaster as there wont be as much to chat about and it may feel a little boring.

 

I'm thinking its good to have at least 2 days a week to yourself.mates.family. It also feels good as you get to miss them and look forward to seeing them when you have arranged.

 

It is very important to retain your personhood in a relationship.

 

Think of it this way...they fell for you because of you the PERSON, right? So, is it a huge surprise when they start getting bored, or the relationship loses the spark when you have LOST yourself as a person? Not really - you are no longer whom they fell for, are you? Of course we all change and grow, but being in a relationship should not stagnate that growth or kidnap your individuality.

 

When people don't do this, they tend to become codependent, and sheltered from the rest of their lives. This suffocates the relationship.

 

How much time you spend together varies for every couple, you need to find your own balance. When I first started dating my current bf for example we saw each other couple times a week, then as we became exclusive more like 5 times a week. Now we live together so we "see" each other everyday, but we also have our time apart too, doing our own thing and following our own interests. Sometimes we have to take trips apart, or see friends apart. We prefer being together as we are best friends, as well as partners, but we also recognize that need to be our own people too and we are not attached at the hip! It really makes the relationship stronger, and more revitalized I believe because we are still individuals, whom choose to be together. We bring more to the relationship by being our own people, not just extensions of one another....

[shorty20]

personally, especially in brand new relationships I only want to see them about 2-3 times a week. Any more than that and A) you'll run out of things to talk about B) when the realtioship progresses and you get more comfortable, it's likley that either you or your partner will want to get back into hanging out with friends etc. and if that wasn't the way things started out then you'll feel rejected or feel that the other dosen't like you anymore. I hope that made sense. The way I see it, there's no sense in rushing relationships take your time and work up to spending all of that time together. Enjoy the time you do have but allow yourselves the time to miss each other every once in a while too!