Confidence -- all in how you say/ask it

[easyguy]

I happened to catch the Vh1 show "Can't Get a Date" last night, and now I'm hooked.

 

One thing that I picked up is that confidence is the most important factor in attraction and talking to girls/women. For example (using the scenario last night), on the show last night, the featured person -- Will, this handsome black guy -- went to a martial arts place to meet up with the instructor to work on confidence. The narrator told Nick to pretend like he was asking out a girl on a dinner date, at which point he said to the camera (unsure of himself), "Would you like to come over to my place on Friday for dinner?"

 

Then the instructor, a short pudgy Asian guy with nerdy glasses, who you wouldn't call a good-looking guy (but they said he has had lots of success with women), was asked to pretend to ask a woman out in front of the camera. He said (with total confidence, and a warm appeal), "Let me make you dinner on Friday at my place... say 7:00?"

 

Now, I'm not very experienced at all with dating, but the way he said it -- wow. Wasn't afraid of being rejected... just making it seem like any ol' thing. He wasn't seeking any approval from the woman (well, camera this time). He got straight to the point, and wasn't afraid to say it. It's not a completely different question, yet it just seems so natural in the way he said it.

 

Anyway, it's just something I noticed.

[DropToZero]

Oh I see what you're talking about in that sense. See easyguy, it's like...let's say you're having trouble asking a girl for her number, because you have lower confidence, and you've taken time to build up that confidence to ask. After you finally get it up, you ask like this "Could I have your number?" or "May I please have your cell number?" etc, you get the idea...it's asking though. All those ways will show doubt in your words, no matter how you say it.

 

In the past I used to ask that way, now when I meet a girl I like, I just say "What's your cell number?" or "Give me your number", and girls have even asked me that way. It just displays the confidence, and most girls aren't going to say no...if they do, maybe be like "oh com'n, I'm only gonna call you like every 20 mins daily", if they say no after that...just leave it alone and walk away.

[quietgrl]

I think "Can't get a date" is a very good show.I hope more people watch this good show.

[Budman]

what time is it on?

 

Ya, don't give them the opportunity to think your a fake.

 

Confidence is knowing you can do it.

[easyguy]

They show re-runs often, but-

 

The next one is on tomorrow (Thursday) at 11pm (not sure what time zone, so you might want to check your TV listings). It's with Will again.