A "Not serious " relationship

[SeaBisquit]

Why do guys do this crap??? I have dated this guy over the last few years. Strictly on a friends basis. He knew that I was in love with someone else and I knew he just came out of a bad realtionship and didn't want to get serious with anyone. We agreed to go out as very good friends. I thought it was really cool to have a guyfriend to talk to. I started dating other guys and he was told about it and he got really pissed off. Now he won't speak to me or even answer my phone calls. I found out that he has been dating several other girls too. So why is he so mad at me???

[Lonelyinasmalltown]

Just a hunch, but it may be that he really did have feelings for you and was hurt when you didn't return them. After all, you did say you dated him for a few years, even though it was just as a friends basis. I have female friends, but I can't imagine that my feelings for them would stay platonic if I actually dated them instead of just hanging out. In fact I know that's not the case. I feel for a friend who was technically "dating" me. I was very hurt when she started dating other people. After all, aren't you supposed to end up happily ever after with your best friend.

 

Chalk it up to a learning experience. If you don't want your male friends to fall for you it might be best to do things in groups with them so they don't mistake anything.

 

Hope this helped you.

[Hope75]

Hmmm...

 

Sounds like a bit of a double standard if you ask me. If he's behaving this way and now won't even talk with you to explain what he's upset about, doesn't seem like he's worth your time.

 

If you are dating others, throw him out of the pot and keep doing what you're doing.

[CarnelianButterfly]

I agree with Hope, it does seem like a double standard, I'd be pissed if a guy acted like that. He's not being very mature about the relationship anyway if he won't communicate with you. Thats always a red flag. If his emotions did get the better of him then its not your fault. He should have told you that he wanted a more serious standing then to go off the handle when you didn't follow some expectation he had. Give him so time to cool off, if he's still not talking to you or blames you, even raises his voice to you, ditch him! He's not worth it.

[Lonelyinasmalltown]

To add to my last post. I still think that's what I said is reason he's upset with you, I think he misinterpretted after time what you two really had. The others are right however. If he can't act in a mature manner to you now, you really are better off without him in your life.

 

Still, just be careful of this kind of thing in the future. If you don't want someone to fall for you, don't date them.