Arghh...just read an old email

[ginger25]

Hiya

 

well this is a bit of a rant really...came home from my mates after drinking copious amounts of red wine and had bright idea to look for an old pic of me in my hotmail inbox, to use on myspace. NOT a good idea - still had emails from my "kind of, but kind of not ex" (i know, it's a looong story that i won't bore u with!) and a picture of us together.

 

Isn't it funny how u read things they said and wonder how those feelings could have changed. Well in this case I guess they didn't it was just the distance between us made him not want to continue. Or so he said.

 

Examples:

 

"was lovely to talk to you last night, it always makes my day"

 

"sorry for being soppy last night, I just remember how seeing you would lift my day up like a kid in a sweet shop, and I haven't had those feelings for a few years, being soppy even now, what have you turned me into?!"

 

Just a month later he was able to cut me off completely, so I guess these are very empty words huh? And I should delete the emails, but I can't seem to. Part of me feels that one day he will come running back realising what a mistake he made, the other knows that I am just kidding myself.

 

Sorry for going on, I really just needed to get that stuff off my chest.

 

p.s. my space is pretty cool I only just heard about it recently, there is like a whole new t'internet world out there that I was oblivious too!

[Lily04]

Yeah, I deleted all of my e-mails from my ex., couldn't really stand them. If you have good feelings towards him it's OK, but if not... deleting might be better =)

[ShySoul]

It does hurt and can be very emotional. You probably don't want to look at them for a long time. But I find deleting them to harsh. At some point the pain will heal and you will want to look back on the good days. You'll want to be able to think about all the fun times together. Delete them and one day you may think back and regret doing that. Maybe print them out and save them someplace, put them all in a box that reminds you of the person. Don't look at it for awhile, bury it in the back of a closet and don't think about it. Then delete it from online. That way you won't be reminded right now, but in the future, when you are ready, you can remember all those moments.

 

Also, while the words seem empty now, at the time he meant them. And a part of him probably does still care about you. But things didn't work out in the way you had both wanted them to. At some point, I hope you can be friends and it doesn't hurt as much.