Survey of the returning ex-lover...

[jigsaw]

For those of you who've had a reunion of any sort, what was the interest level of the dumper upon return for a 2nd chance?

 

Were they skeptical, but still interested in giving it another shot?

Or was it like as though all of their passion was rejuevenated?

 

I'm not asking this for any reason other than curiosity. Thanks!

[solo34]

Great questions and post...hope someone has some positive feedback 2 put here.

 

-Solo34

[roxy79]

Well...I hadn't talked to my ex in over a year and he recently stopped me in the parking lot at work. I thought that maybe this was his way of getting his foot back in the door with me (considering he could have talked to me at any point in the past year, but didn't). I had also heard he was asking about my to my friends. So of course my thoughts were that he wanted to get "us" a second chance, maybe... but unfortunately, nothing has transpired since then. Definetly caught me off guard and got me thinking again..

[lillady898]

I have no idea what any guy is feeling... ever. Unless of course they spit it out. So I really couldn't answer that.

 

But I do know that every time a guy has come back to me for a second chance, I've felt a bit skeptical everytime, regardless of how intense my emotions were towards them. Usually my intuition AND my brains is correct, but those emotions...

 

(By the way, this has only happened a couple times.)

[merickso]

well, i think its clear from my posts that she (my ex) is skeptical but trying to give it a chance somewhat.

[Celadon]

When my ex came back, I think it was because he was lonely, not because he was any more interested in committing to me. He might have fooled himself into thinking he was being sincere, but there were some telltale signs he wasn't.

 

For one thing, some mutual friends warned him to get serious the second time around, which he resented the hell out of. He went through the motions, but it was pretty half-hearted. For another, all he did was keep complaining that I wasn't as "into" him as before. You bet I wasn't. He had to prove to me he was worth more of my time. And in the end, he couldn't, because our relationship (in his mind) was all about him, not us.

 

Personally, I don't think getting back together with the dumper is worth it. Just move on and find someone better.

[smallworld]

My ex (first bf) definitely wanted a second chance. The problem was I had already given him multiple second chances, so that when I finally ended things there was no doubt in my mind that it would never work out between us. Giving up on him was one of the hardest things I'd ever had to do and he didn't make it easy by calling me long distance and playing me love songs (i.e. "Unchained Melody") to remind me of what we once had. A part of me still loves him to this day, but when I think of him I just feel sad and hope that he finally resolved all those issues that kept us apart.