Decision

[becallamjr]

I posted on here the other day that I had gone back to cutting myself and was seriously considered suicide. Well as you can see, I chose not to kill myself. On the other hand, I have had lot's of time to think. I don't want to go get help anymore. The meds and the therapy only mask the pain. The only thing that makes me feel better is to cut into myself. At least for the depression, I haven't figured out what I wanna do for the mania yet, but I am working on it. If anyone else can relate feel free to reply.

[XxGabbyAbbxX]

maybe this. i dunno, im not therapist or anything but coming from personal experience try helping others with the same problem and it will turn out to be self theraputic... if that makes sense? ..in the past 2 weeks at my school there have been 3 suicides. no words can explain how much hell my school and my friends have been thru in the past 2 weeks. suicide effects soooo many ppl and angers and confuses everyone. it sucks. self pain.. thats somethin that can be hidden obviously and i personally cant help on that topic much becuase i cant really say i kno wut im talkin about. but suicide is so painful to everyone. soo think about it and i hope everything gets better!

[tmp0620]

Life's a journey. There's ups and downs.

 

You kill yourself and you'll never know what you missed. Cutting yourself is the only thing that makes you feel better because that's the only thing that you want to make yourself feel better. There are other things that can help you release your depression. Go out and find them. Change your lifestyle.

[ocrob]

I had never heard about cutting until coming to this site. I think we all abuse ourselves in different ways. I think I do it with alcohol. I guess we all have to decide what we want in life. We all have the opportunity to make things better, but we seem to just give up and take the easy way out. Killing yourself is the biggest cop out you could ever do. It is so much harder to live than to die. I love challenges and thrive at accomplishments. I think you and I and all of us need something to motivate ourselves. Find something that you like and invest yourself in it. There is nothing more satisfying than having a goal and working towards it. Is there anything that you have dreamed about doing or becoming? It does not matter whether you accomplish your goal, but that you try. You can be a 5'1" person that does not know how to play basketball. If you decide you want to be a professional ball player, then practice and go after your dream. It may not happen, but you are at least going after your dream. I know from my own experience that when we are not challenged or going after something we become dead inside. Find something that you want and dedicate your time to achieving that goal. Who cares if you realize it, but just do it. The best times in my life were when I was younger and surfed. All I could think about was getting in the water. It consumed my life. I would not go to parties or drink because I was going to get up at 5 am to surf. It was amazing. I don't have that drive anymore, but would love to find something where I had the same passion. Find something that challenges you and motivates you and I guarantee things will change. There is nothing better than doing something you love. I miss those times, but I am determined to find them again. It is so easy to quit. Anyone can be a quitter, but not many can go after their dreams. If you are ready to die, then you are even more ready to live. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain. Here is a very tough love comment. Stop taking the easy way out and do something about your situation. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. You can do anything you want, if you have the courage. Stop being a coward and take the reins of your life. You are a winner and can do anything you put your mind to. Get in a routine and set a goal for yourself. I don't know what that may be, but do something. Start getting up at 5 am everyday and go for a run or work out or do something. Exercise is an endorphine and it feels amazing. I have been a lethargic fat * * * for the last month, but I will get back to working out and feeling good. Just do it.

[ShySoul]

Although I don't take meds, I have a strong aversion to them and wouldn't take them myself. However, in your case I really think they would be helpful. It may not be a permanent solution, but is can help in the short term until you have talked over and worked through your problems and what is causing yo to feel this way. The therapy is what helps and will lead you to getting better, the bills just help aid the process.

 

The cutting is also a way of masking things. It doesn't do anything to help. What does do something is getting help and talking about how you feel. Work through your emotions. In time, things get better, you will feel better, and you won't need the meds nor feel the need to cut.

 

Hope you get through this.