I think my friend broke up with me???

[ElektraHere]

Hi There,

 

I have posted before about my friend and how my feelings for him were more then he had for me. I may have expressed to much and he is uncomfortable with what I had said. Basically that I liked him alot, wanted to wait for him, and if needed I would consider moving closer to him. I also mentioned how I didn't want girls pursuing him. I know that it was a selfish comment but I was just telling him how I felt not ordering him around or anything. I thought we had an upfront and honest friendship.

 

Anyways for the past four days I haven't talked with him (we talk almost daily) but I was trying to give him space and alone time. I have seen him online but let him be so that he would know I am respectful of his time and to him. I thought for sure he would of called tonight. He did not. I wrote him an email telling him I know he needs time to himself but that I just wanted to have some peace of mind that things between us were ok. I did not get any response.

 

I was working on a surprise for him and told him last week that I was. Well it came through today. I was bidding on an item for him on ebay and I won the auction. It was a 1st edition book signed by his favorite author. I was so excited that I called and left messages on his cell and home phone about the book. I thought for sure he would call about that. Nope again he didn't call. All I want to know is if we are still on the up and up.

 

It is breaking my heart not knowing where our friendship stands. I can only take from the silence that he has no interest in a friendship with me anymore. I always have jumped to the wrong conclusion but this is 4 days worth of silence. He came out last month to visit and we had a wonderful time even after he left we still had it going great. It just was the other night that everything stopped dead cold.

 

I miss him and his friendship. I want him to know that it is breaking my heart not knowing about our friendship, and that I beat myself up over and over for saying anything about my feelings to him.

 

I have lost so much in the last year he was somewhat of a brightlight in all of the darkness. Now he may have left to and I sit in the dark yet again.

 

Help!! What do I do?

[Tigris]

It sounds to me like you need to talk to him in person. Why don't you go and visit him? That way you can give him the present in person.

[ElektraHere]

I would visit him in person but he lives 3000 miles away. We live on opposite coasts. So the only way to talk to him is via IM or on the phone.

[WesternEdge]

You say you want to give him space. Four days is not that much space, and also you e-mailed him, and left those messages on his phones. When you told him how you felt about him, that was a very big deal and it may take him a while to process it. I know it's hard (I am in a similar friendship) but leave him alone, really alone, for a while. I have a feeling it's going to work out fine, as your friendship seems to be very strong.

[ariyadhana]

Hey I'm also in a very similar situation.

 

I've had feelings for my friend for over 2 years. This has created a lot of problems in our friendship. He just moved to a new city 1000 miles away, and has decided he wants a break to deal with his "frustration and resentment" towards me. He told me we are no longer best friends, and I was beyond crushed. I professed my feelings for him a few days ago, and he ignored me. The next day I got in touch with him and asked if all was lost, and he said no, but that he wasn't sure we could be close friends again due to his "frustration" with me. I'm pretty choked up right now. I don't know what to do. I feel like I've done a lot for him, and yeah he helped me through a lot, oh and I got him a drawing signed by his favourite artist as a going away present when he moved. Yeah I can totally relate to you. I guess I'm a bit better off as at least my friend told me he was taking a break from me and didnt just disappear. I think pulling the disappearing act is awful, but maybe it will be better in the long run. I am going onto day four of no contact with my former best friend. It's pretty rough but I am getting by and starting to feel stronger.