Lonely and fed up!

[fantasia2004]

if you want more, then don't settle for less. if everyone always did that, then einstein would have perhaps never advanced the theory of quanta, or neuton would have never cared to think further into the apple falling. ( tru these are over the top examples. but my point does still stand)

 

to be honest, i know it's hard to find someone thats looking for something other than a way to be pleasured. but isn't the wait worth it if you do indeed find that person? keep that chin up hun and don't worry, life and love always throw you in the direction you never thought of

 

wow! and double wow!

[blah17]

Love will find you when the time is right.

I married very young and ended up divorced. Thought that I never wanted to have a realtionship again. Thought that love was just a myth something that would never happen to me.

 

I am now involved with a man that is the sweetest, most wonderful person for me. Love found me I was not out looking and neither was he. Enjoy your life and eventually everything will fall into place.

 

This is the worst advice I have ever read.

 

1) If a person is extremely shy / asocial, 'things wont just fall into place'

2) If a person does not genuinely have a 'strong interest' in being around other people, thinks will not just 'fall into place'

3) If a person does not go out to social places (clubs, bars, social events, gym, whatever) things will not just fall into place.

4) If a person does not actively 'date' things will not fall into place.

 

It's pure lunacy to give someone advice that they will 'just fall into place'. Especially if their lives are not together or they have issues with socializing.

[fantasia2004]

I think it is so frightening to be alone and single.

however it should be liberating, that you are not being told what to do. worry about diseases pregnancies unwanted that is.

compromising. Hard for me to do it.

 

 

Enjoy it now! the alone time of knowing youself and who you are. because for me I am losing my mind when I should be calm and collected and comfortable with myself.

[skyblue1]

It's so depressing feeling like this the only people that seem to care and give advise are you guys. God hate feeling like this.

[fantasia2004]

why should you feel like this why? I can not understand what else would it take to make you feel good?

[blah17]

Being single for 3.5 years does feel like forever. The thing that kills it is that my friends don't go out much and that means i stay home and do nothing. It's being single and friends not bothering with me that gets me upset. None of my friends understand. I need to meet new people and go on more dates. i think i will take ariyahana's advice. Thank u -- if you guys have any other suggestions would be greatfull.

 

You just need to make it one of your goals to socialize more, go out be interested in people, and ask them out on dates, thats it really. You're the one keeping yourself at home, you dont have to go out with your friends you can go out by yourself you know.

 

All you really are looking for is to talk to people you find attractive and connect with and see where that leads, then attempt to build on that.

[skyblue1]

I guess it's because i've been alone for such a long time. Starting to think i'm never going to meet that speical someone. It always seems to fall apart when i'm dating someone.

[Scout]

I've tried loads of things like internet dating, been speed dating once, joined the gym and still no luck.

 

Well...these seem like pretty standard ways of meeting someone, and so the competition is probably very broad. How about really narrowing down your playing field to increase your chances of meeting someone truly right for you? For example, follow your heart and get involved in something you've always dreamed of, and you're likely to meet a kindred spirit. Ever fantasized about being an actress? Join a community theater group! Maybe you've fantasized about being someone who rescues people, who makes a real change in the world - then join a human rights group! I say, take a real chance. Not only will you maybe meet the person of your dreams, you'll also be involved in activities that are truly meaningful to you.

 

And in all honesty, I don't see how anyone can make a meaningful connection at a speed-dating event. I've read about them, and frankly, it sounds like a ghastly, horribly uncomfortable way to meet people of the opposite sex.

[skyblue1]

update: i've signed up to this web site it's like a social group thing and i've met those of nice people. Thanks for your advise people X

[ginger25]

Hi, I totally sympathise with u skyblue. I've been single for about 2 years now, minus a 1 month relationship (if I can call it that), which broke by heart but also restored my faith in the idea that you can meet that person who will treat you with the respect you deserve.

 

I agree there do seem to be more & more blokes only after one thing, and a lot not wanting commitment of any sort. I figure that by the time we get to our thirties they might have grown up a bit and we might stand more of a chance! Actually, for some reason I thought there were more nice eligible young men in London than in other places in the UK.. but perhaps not?!