Helped my girlfriend through divorce but now having problems

[confused_male_32]

Hello, this is my first time at a forum such as this so please be kind. I met my girlfriend when she was married to someone else but wanted to get divorced because her ex was extremely abusive (emotional not physical). I was very supportive and helped her through a very difficult divorce and our relationship was great until about a few weeks ago. I must mention that we live in different cities but we see each other every week. Now she is planning to take up a job in the city where I live and we have been talking about buying a house etc.

All of a sudden, one day she tells me that she is not sure about us and needs time to think. She told me that she needs some time alone. I respected her decision and stopped calling and meeting her even though it tore my heart to shreds. Will she leave me? why is this happening to me? How do I react to this situation? Will this time apart eventually lead to breakup?

If anyone has any insight to offer, I will be very grateful.

[passions1]

Nobody knows except for her if she wishes to breakup or not. All you can do is what you're doing now, is respect her wishes & see what happens. But try to be strong & keep yourself busy with activities & hobbies.

 

You had a life before you met her, don't forget that.

[kalobaby]

It seems that there's need to be more communication between you and your GF. Why don't u sit down and talk 2 her? She might not want to make a commitment again, maybe it's too soon? Or maybe she still has feelings for her ex? Whatever it is have an open mind to accept her decision. It's true you helped her out and I'm sure she appreciates it but, give her some time, and the truth shall prevailed.

[stolenshadow]

Hi, you obviously know more about the relationship, if it's strong, how it all started, what kind of person she is and what are her life goals, from what you said I think she needed help during the divorce, now that's over she can move on and focus on something else.

 

You must not contact her, no matter how bad you feel, if after one or two months she doesn't contacts you then you must talk, you might not get clear answers but you will know better where you stand.

 

Just take things calmly, use this time apart for you too, evaluate what you want for the future and give the time you used for her to you. Don't stop your life until she decides, whether she wants to continue the relationship or not you must go on with your life.

Take care.