I need a big big HELP ASAP :cry:

[Ammie]

I and my bf for a year and half just broke up. It's because of the fact that we went too strong from the start, it was all good till about a couple of months ago we had lots of arguments about space. I admit that I wanted him there all the time but he also needed times to himself. Now he called it off saying that it has to be done and he doesn't want anyone right now, not for a while. He said his feelings have changed and he doesn't love me anymore and he is sorry he broke my heart he didn't want to. I burst into tears and so did he, I could say he was crying more than I was... I think I cried a lot before that too. for all my life, I've never seen any guy cried that much before. Does he still have feelings for me but he only needs time to think and that I better give him time and wait? Or is it finished, over whatever he calls it? But there is no one else in his life that's for sure. He said he wants to be friends with me, and when he's up for the relationship again he will think of me first before anyone but now he needs times alone. We talked on the phone before he said he misses me but he doesn't wanna get back together right now he needs times to think of what's happened and that I should not wait. What does he mean, tell me please. Does he still love me but have to be mean because so then he can get his space for a while to think? Please anyone help me please, I am lost without him. We were good, perfect but we only had problem with space.

[speedracer780]

I feel for you. It's hard to be without the one you love. However, you need to learn how to be your own person and to enjoy life alone. I think that you don't know how to do this which led you to be needy and clingy to him. Which drove him away from you. Maybe if you can ever learn how to be independent and by some chance he takes you back your life together will be much better. If not at least the next guy won't be driven away by the whole needy thing.

[Heretic]

Love doesn't end just because a relationship does. Trust me. If it did, it would make a whole lot of peoples lives easier.

 

As far as what you should do? Give him some space... if he wants to be in a relationship later he'll let you know. If he doesn't there's nothing you can do now about it. Pushing the matter will only drive him away.

 

By all means call him though, talk to him, be a part of his life... just less then you used to an not in girlfriend capacity.

 

Hope this helps.

[bzborow1]

Basically he means everything he is saying. After spending the time he did with you there will always be feelings for you, although now they seem to be in a different way. He's being totally honest with you in saying he needs time to be alone, and that you should not wait up for him. The only thing I don't agree with is him saying there may be a future relationship between you two, I suggest you have no part in that discussion.

 

To get better, I would suggest you tell him you don't want to speak with him anymore. You need to get away from him completely until you can clear your head and move on. Believe me, it's really tough to do, but you won't be able to be around him w/o thinking "does he still like me" unless you get away from him for however long it takes to be able to move on emotionally.

 

YOU NEED SOME SPACE to heal!!!!!!!!