Men Talking About My Relationships...

[lillady898]

Why when I mention to my male friends or coworkers or even just male acquentances that I have a boyfriend, they ask me so many questions about him and throughout the conversation make reference towards him.

 

For an example, today I was casually talking to a coworker about how I used to visit a college quite frequently. He asked me if I had a family member there and I said no, a boyfriend. He asked me how old he was, if three years was that big of an age difference for us, how often I visit him, what he does, and so on. Me and this guy aren't even that close and usually do not get that personal at all until we talk about social issues. Then I changed the subject. Somehow, about a whole hour later, he comes to talk to me and asks, "So, does this mean you're transferring to this other college?" Making reference to my boyfriend. And I casually just say I'm more concerned with the academics of a college so I can pursue my lifetime dreams.

 

Are guys really this interested in other people's relationships? I thought they didn't even talk about the details in a relationship.. Or is it only there own relationships they won't talk about? This seems to happen quite frequently... It's just odd. Any insight into the male mind about this would be great!

[Mr. B]

Some people are just nosey, I know my co-workers are... they gab about their personal lives all the time, as if anyone cares... maybe it's a cultural thing.

[xmrth]

I've had other males butt into my personal business such as my own relationship.

Whatever you do, don't ever take what they say seriousely.

Some males (and even females towards other males on their relationships) tend to try to make you think you can do better-- better like THEM, and putting your boyfriend and relationship down over nothing.

It's good to mention you have a boyfriend so that no guy will think they have a chance with you. But don't take to heart what they say unless you fully trust their opinion like they are actually good close friends and know the two of you.

[phishgirl]

I can relate to you. It took me a while to realize, but it sounds to me like your guy coworker(s) have a thing for you. They are feeling out your relationship and commitment towards your boyfriend, and by asking if you're transferring, they're really asking how committed you are. If you are committed, definitely make this clear to them. If not, remember that relationships with coworkers don't typically end up successful-though I have no idea if you are interested in this guy at work or not. I have a boyfriiend of 4 years, and my guy coworkers ask me about my bf and my relationship all the time, and invite me out without him frequently. From an objective perspective and from experience, your guy coworkers are interested in you and want to hear that you're available, boyfriend or not. Whatever your decision, make it clear that you're committed or not before it goes to far.