Ex is back in town

[The_Doc]

Well the ex is back in town tomorrow and staying at my best friends!!! (He is away but she is staying with his g/f).

 

So she called after 3 weeks telephone silence -- friendly.. mostly small talk. Wants to meet for a coffee.

 

She heads off to the village on Thursday where our mutual friends are getting married in on Saturday (she is bridesmaid).

 

All of this has stirred up all of my emotions for her and I realise that I am still madly in love with her -- and this is before I have seen her.

 

I kept the call short and said that I expected her to be too busy to hook up but she said she would have the time after work tomorrow.

 

She also asked me if my offer to drive her back to the airport on Sunday was still open -- I said it was (I know I should have said no... but maybe her friends will persuade her that its not a good idea and save me from this).

 

She doesn't know I have started dating and I am in a dilemma whether to tell her or to tell the newbie. As I have said before this place is small and our friends are mostly mutual so unless everyone is very discrete there is a high probability that she will find out... how this will affect her I have absolutely no idea.

 

I also don't want to hurt/upset the newbie and I am parnoid about either the newbie running into us or the ex running into the newbie and me!!

 

Part of me feels like boarding the first plane to North Korea and hiding out there until the wedding is over and she has left.

 

As for the wedding itself!! OMG seeing her looking a million bucks in her birdesmaid outfit will be tough as will the fact that eveyone at the wedding would have been the people we would have invited to our wedding!!! (Including the bride who would have been our bridesmaid). Cruel twist of fate heh -- to give you a glimpse of 'what could have been'.

 

Do people think any of this will be going through her head -- even though she was the dumper??

 

Really need some advice and words of comfort... I was coping really well until last night now I just don't know what to do with myself...

 

1. What will happen with the ex if anything

2. How I feel about the newbie

3. Who to tell what if anything

 

Life just gets messier and messier

[DN]

Don't tell either one about the other. What would be the point?

[The_Doc]

Well I told both of them!!!

 

With regards the newbie she said she really appreciated the honesty -- especially about the fact that my ex will be at the wedding I am going to on Saturday. She told me about her break-up and in sharing it brought us a little closer together -- the kiss afterwards was more emotionally laden than those before.

 

As for the ex well she reacted too well to the news I was dating someone. She was laughing and joking about the age difference and said she was happy for me. I was expecting her to be upset, angry?? at least a little jealous but nothing of the sort. It was a real curveball!!

 

Anyway the ex is now back in town and we are meeting for a coffee in a few hours... she knows I still love her but her reaction to the above news seemed to suggest to me that she has moved on so much further than I have... makes me feel that she never valued me as much as I valued her.

 

Anyhow despite everything I have some trepidation about the meeting although practically no expectations... except that there will probably be a swirl of emotions when i see her. I know some of you would advise me not to meet her but we have always wanted to remain friends -- however tough that might be and this will be the first 'direct' contact for almost 8 weeks...

 

How should I act? Advice from similar situations people have found themselves in is desperately needed!!!