Gettin better... comments?

[misery12]

Hey all, I am just posting here.. to let you all know what's going on..

As you all probably know my ex and I broke up 3 weeks ago.. and today I was planning on talking to her about getting back together.. but she wasn't home, and I went and watched her soccer game with a buddy of mine.

Anyways, a mutual friend(female) of my ex and mine.. have been helping me out, and we have been talking about me and my ex for a few days, she was just helping me through it.. (friend and ex are on same soccer team). Anyways, today I guess my ex tried to find out what I have been saying about her.. and the friend didn't tell her anything.. and she said "even if he did say something, it would be good" and my ex replied "YES!!".

 

Now tonight, this friend was talking to my ex on the phone.. and she told my ex "he loves spending time with you, and thinks you two are great for each other, is he said he was willing to go as slow as you need if you were willing to give it another shot".

 

She isn't talking for us.. she was just tellin my ex what we chatted about for the past few days.

 

ANYWAYS - i guess my ex replied to the friend saying she will see how saturday goes.. and she will think about giving me another chance.

(me, ex, friend, and friends boyfriend are coming over to swim and hang out saturday).

 

My ex also told my friend how she didn't like it when we were going out.. that I would always ask her how she was feeling about the relationship, because she found it annoying. I feel I have changed this way, because I was just insecure.. and my insecurities are which cost me the relationship, I have now realized that I cannot worry, until she gives me a REAL reason to worry.. not something stupid/juvenial.

 

so.. I think on saturday I will just act normal, and fun to be around.. as if we were just starting to go out for the first time.. let her see what she's been missing..

 

How's this all sound?

[DN]

Sounds like a plan.

[ReadyorNot]

How old are you and your ex?

[Hope75]

My ex also told my friend how she didn't like it when we were going out.. that I would always ask her how she was feeling about the relationship, because she found it annoying. I feel I have changed this way, because I was just insecure.. and my insecurities are which cost me the relationship, I have now realized that I cannot worry, until she gives me a REAL reason to worry.. not something stupid/juvenial.

 

Do you think if she takes you back, you will be able to keep this under control?

 

I know you've been feeling very insecure about the relationship, and now that she broke up with you, you will really need to learn to trust her and not harp on it all the time if she takes you back.

 

This will be hard to do, are you up for it?

 

If she goes for it, try to relax and enjoy the time you spend together, and not stress so much about where it's going or what she is feeling.

 

Watch her actions. That should give you an idea. No one likes to be harassed about their feelings all the time.

[misery12]

I am ready.. I am prepared.

If she's willing to give me another shot.. I AM willing to be 110% into changing my past ways. I just used to find myself wondering "why did she do that, why'd she say that" even when it didn't mean anything in the end, and I would stress about it.. and would p*ss her off.. which is understandable.. I do have to relax, and I do feel A LOT more laid back now. I am completley ready to committ to her..

 

Another thing.. Friday night she is going to a party/bondfire , and she said she may be drinking.. and I am just thinking "please don't do something stupid.. " because I don't want her to mess things up. But then I think, if she did make out with some guy, or something stupid, I wouldnt want to be with someone like that anyways. The other thing was that I don't want her to go to the party and suddenly fall for another guy, or realize some guy is cute.. and then blow me off..

Then again, I think this is my insecurities.. and so I swallowed it.. and I do feel better.. I have to trust her.. and once I do trust her, and she doesn't break it.. then we have something.

 

SO I told her to go, and have a fun night. Plus I may be going to a party of my own that my semi close friend is having.. and we're hanging out the next day anywyas.. so no worries.

[Hope75]

Mis,

 

Good for you. You are right not to try and tell her what to do at this party Friday night.

 

She has not committed to anything with you yet, so as of right now you have no right to tell her what to do anyway, and like you said, if she does meet someone, you would prefer to know now and there wouldn't be anymore trying anyway.

 

Trust that if she gives you a second chance it will be because you both want to work on it, and if not, you can start with your own life without her, and without any worries.

[misery12]

Thanks Hope, DN, annie, and all the others that have helped through all this. I will keep you all posted on how things are going.

 

Thanks again!