relationship advice how to help my gf

[kevinV2]

What should I do to help my girlfriend when she says she is having a hard time emotionally but she says there is no reason why she is sad, she doesn't know the reason and said she needs time and space for her alone but we do text  but not very much and call at night but is quiet also keep in mind that she told me that she also was depressed and went to therapy  in the past so maybe it has something to do with that

she is 20 and i am 21 been together for 6 months.

[SooSad33]

Time.. for what?  Time away from you (the relationship).

If she is having a hard time 'emotionally', sounds like she is having some issue's going on in there.

So, if she is asking for 'time', then you just lay low and give her, her time.

Do not get in her face... let her have time to gather her thoughts. As long as she knows you are there, it is up to her to reach out.

But, imo, if she has been pulling away (going distant), she may be questioning everything.

[kevinV2]

20 minutes ago, SooSad33 said:

Time.. for what?  Time away from you (the relationship).

If she is having a hard time 'emotionally', sounds like she is having some issue's going on in there.

So, if she is asking for 'time', then you just lay low and give her, her time.

Do not get in her face... let her have time to gather her thoughts. As long as she knows you are there, it is up to her to reach out.

But, imo, if she has been pulling away (going distant), she may be questioning everything.

Time for herself i guess but we do text sometimes and do call at night but we do our own thing most of the times. but she was in the past despressed and went to therapy so maybe it has something to do with that i don't know

[SooSad33]

It could.  When one deals with depression, it can really take hold and overwhelm 😞 .

Have you looked up depression and how it can affect someone? I wonder if maybe she should keep up with the therapy..

Is nice you two chat now & then.  

Just give her some time.

 

[Rose Mosse]

It's likely she already knows you're unhappy with the way things are. It adds to the pressure between the both of you so leave off a little and be patient with her if she's in therapy or getting help or seeing a doctor for her depression.

There have to be tangible steps forward that show she's taking steps to look after her depression. Go about other activities, spend more time with your friends and engage with other interests and hobbies.

Do both of you communicate well or is she open to talking with you on a regular basis? If that's the case remain understanding of what she's saying but ultimately, you are making that choice to be there as a partner so you should have some idea of what works for you in a partnership/relationship. Avoiding each other is not the answer.

If it's not working for you or it's beyond what you can handle or your scope, the kindest thing to both of you is to go your separate ways.

[kevinV2]

Yes she is very open and we do communicate but lately not anymore since she saiys she is tired and doesn't have the energy to talk about it so I don't really bring it up for the past 2 days now

[SooSad33]

Yah, just leave things be.  Let her deal with her stuff.

I asked if you have learned anything on depression, etc.. to try & understand it.  Did you say you have?

[kevinV2]

No I don't know anything about depression or how it effect someone. but i will definitelyread about it