Coworkers from hell, please help

[mia500]

The forms of showing me that there's a problem between my coworkers and I have gotten a bit rediculous. There are some people there that I get along with but those that I don't can really give me anxiety. I had some sort of canker sore in my mouth and this guy I work with felt it. I'm now calling off this budding relationship because I don't wanna mix business and romance. Anyway, later I was walking toward my supervisor (he and the supervisor seem really close) and she didn't know I could hear her lowly talking from down the hall about a patient, but she all of a sudden yelled out "mouth ulcers!" the second I walked by. Her conversation had nothing to do with mouth ulcers and it came out of nowhere I took this as her knowing something and throwing shade at me. I feel like I sound like a baby but why do people have to be so mean and make fun of you all the time. Now I feel like I'm in a huge hole because when I first started volunteering I agreed to work for my supervisor and do a Sunday class for the patient's with her, and it's about time for those classes to start now. (I am now just volunteering at this job.) I went to her the other day and said "Can I actually just wait to think about doing the classes?" She replied "Can you think about it?!" And immediately/slightly aggressively started showing me the flyer she made and talking about me doing the class. I'm really indecisive and can be a bit of a yes girl so I changed my mind really fast because I got excited for it all over again. I don't know if she's being manipulative and wants to use me to have more money and another class going (which at some level is the idea, but it shouldn't be in a mean way, you know?). Or I can't tell if she does have respect and is just pushing me and challenging me because I'm really shy, which I'd feel less bad over. It just feels like she's having me do this for her (I'll be getting paid though) and all the while I'm not getting respected fully. I'm very excitable with the kids, they love me. But when I'm talking to adults I can seem more serious, and because of this she sings the Twilight Zone theme song sometimes when I'm around or if she just spoke to me and the other workers start laughing at me. I don't know what to do because I can't turn to her with honesty over it. Like once I got an annoying text, and rolled my eyes a bit then looked at someone in the waiting room. I saw the lady in the waiting room whispering to the other lady that works there after. I think she told on me as if I was rolling my eyes at her because my supervisor later said "Who you rolling your eyes at?" And I turned around out of guilt and she wasn't even talking to anyone! She was talking to herself. I didn't say anything. I explained my side of the story, saying I saw something on my phone when we were closing just to stay on good terms and she said no, no one complained. I think she lied because why else would she randomly say that?

 

My issue is I don't know how I'm gonna work with someone that blatantly makes fun of me. We work in a very small clinic and there's truly no space to act in such a way to each other. It's just seriously not healthy for me to be feeling insecure about my relationships and I have no idea if I should call the class off or not for good. Does anyone else's coworkers/supervisor do this? I'm really unsure about what to do

[rosephase]

Maybe you aren't being clear about your treatment but everything you mentioned seems normal, not intended to hurt you and I didn't see her making fun of you either. She said "mouth ulcers" when you weren't expecting it... she pushed for you to take a class...and had an awkward social interaction with you. I'm not seeing anything that is out of line.

 

When and how has she blatantly made fun of you?

[rosephase]

Hey Mia,

 

I re-read some of your old threads and it seems like you might have a very paranoid version of the world. Knowing that, I would say that what you posted here is most likely in your head... or much smaller than it feels to you.

 

How has your search for a real in person therapist going? I think that is probably your best bet for dealing with this world that seems out to get you.

[mia500]

Hey Mia,

 

I re-read some of your old threads and it seems like you might have a very paranoid version of the world. Knowing that, I would say that what you posted here is most likely in your head... or much smaller than it feels to you.

 

How has your search for a real in person therapist going? I think that is probably your best bet for dealing with this world that seems out to get you.

 

Hi, I do agree that I might overthink some things. But I did explain in more depth to my therapist some other stories and she let me know that it does sound like I'm being made fun of in different situations. This story isn't so clear but at the same time I need to remember to stay positive, and not assume things.