How Do I Control My Attitude Problem?

[HumanPinCushion]

I posted a topic in the Jealousy Forum and this kinda goes hand in hand w/ that. I have never been a jealous person cause I never had any reason to be, but after meet'n my soulmate I have been noticing I get very jealous when it comes to My Girl and other guys. Thing is, is that I was bullied most of my childhood and then as a teen or alittle before I became the bully. To this day I'll throw down at the drop of a hat. The problem is, is that My Girl is a Hippy and she isn't into none of that violent stuff. While in England for my first visit, we're at the super market and some guy is staring at her and it turned out he was somebody that crossed her once in her past and I got so bad she dropped her buggy right there in the middle of the store and walked out. I was screaming and threatening and just being pretty much a d*ckhead. I hate most of the time and I know that kills My Girl. Well I don't wanna ruin what we have from this no more the I do w/ my jealousy problem. Is the a simple way to fix this, cause if so then let me know. I've been like this all my life and its gotta change before I loss her.

 

Yeah, we have talked alot about my problems and I'm try'n to fix it in my head that get'n angry isn't the way to go for our sake. While in England, she seen a side of me that she didn't care for. I have done alot of violent related stuff when I was pushed over the edge...some that would have landed me in prison for sure, but I have never been in a position where I had reason to care or stop how I have been for yrs. until now. I get a certain satisfaction when someone crosses me and I burn their house down, or when a man twice my size goes off on me at his son's soccor game and I jumped his other son (who couldn't be more then 7) in the bathroom and took my anger out on him. See'n that man while out and about 2 yrs later and for him to make cracks aloud about me and that day to his co-worker and w/ a smile on his face the whole time, and smiling back I gave him details about me watching his son goto the restroom and me going in behind him and beat'n him down and him pay'n for what his daddy did. The look on his face when I filled him in was reward enough. I KNOW I KNOW...Thats needs to change. Something just takes over in me and I can't help it, but I know this will be the fall of me and her if I don't change. I am moving to England in April and since my first trip to England, I have made somewhat of a Sh*t List of people that will be hear'n from me. My girl is already scared for the people that I'll be dealing w/ as well as worried about us. I need to get help and I know this. Being in this relationship has gave me something to change for and I am working on that. I get angry now, I write words to My Girl that assures her I'm ok and Love Her very much.

 

Thank You All For Listening and Take Care

[katiemt]

I'm not sure I have good advice for you, but just from a girl's perspective, it is really scary to see a guy who will go off at anything. The reason behind that is that I think that a way a person treats other people is the way that person will treat you, eventually, once the honeymoon is over.

 

So, when I see a guy who has a hair-trigger temper and gets mean really easy, I think that eventually that is the way he will be if we have a conflict.

 

Maybe you can work on letting go of some of that anger? Like, if you see some guy who likes your girl, instead of getting pissed, you can think to yourself, "well, she's with me, not him." And instead of concentrating on how pissed off he makes you feel, concentrate on the good feelings, give your girl a kiss and a hug and tell her how lucky you feel to be with her.

 

As a girl, I guarantee this will be HUGE and she will really appreciate it. The first few times you do it, it may be hard, but we can all learn new behaviors. Good luck!

[Dubz]

i agree with katiemt about the scared thing, girls do get scared when they see there b/f go off at the slightist thing, i really think u need to talk to ur g/f and explain to her that u have these problems, i also think that u should seek professional help with these problems before u do sometihing that u will regret, i hope everything works out for you, take care.

[HumanPinCushion]

Thank You for the words