Light at the end of the metaphorical tunnel

[AvaD21]

It's now been over a month since I last spoke to my ex, maybe too soon in writing this post but for how I feel I don't think it is.

 

For those who have read my posts, my ex and I broke up in Dec 2015 and carried on some on off weird 'relationship' in the year that followed. I now look back on 2016 thinking there's 1000 things I'd do differently but hey ho new year no dwelling.

 

I last spoke to him after he came back, confused wanting to be with me but he was in a casual relationship with someone else and thought I was too much of a risk to unsettle the new relationship. I told the girl everything that had happened, had a short, tense conversation after with my ex where we both said we wouldn't speak again and here I am.

 

The first couple weeks he was on my mind every day. Especially Christmas and new year. I have no idea if he's in a relationship with the other girl by now.

 

I feel very happy in my life. He pops in my head but it's more memories that remind me of him than me feeling any form of emotion to him. I don't miss him anymore. And that is where I want to be. I'm focusing on my own progression at the moment and making plans for the year with friends and in my head I've never felt stronger.

 

For anyone having a hard time, you will get here. You'll beat yourself up and feel bad and upset and broken and like that person is the only one for you but honestly, that changes. People will tell you it does and you may not believe them. 'Nah it's different for me'. It isn't.

 

Be strong, look forward and realise that maybe they weren't the amazing person you feel they are post breakup.

[Wiseman2]

Excellent you finally went no contact. Now delete and block him from all social media and messaging.

 

It's really time to put your time and energy into dating again...it's been 13 mos since the breakup.

I broke up in Dec 2015 and carried on some on off weird 'relationship' in the year that followed.

[Loralora]

That's how I felt about my ex. Like I would never love again, or trust again...it turned out I can love, trust, and do everything but even better this time because I learned from my mistakes. It took me almost two years to forget him and start to go on dates with other people. He was my first. It was like the end of the world for me, eventhough I ended it, I didn't really mean it, I just wanted him to change and he just didn't want to change or try anymore. He told me he had given up on me.

 

It took time, tears, sadness, random dates with weird people(only after 2years passed did I start going on dates), nerves, loneliness, moments of despair...but in the end I found someone not perfect..but at least someone who I am happy to be with and plan on spending my future with..

 

I would contact him every 2 months or 3..sometimes 5. I had a hard time accepting it...I was in denial...until I met my current boyfriend.

 

My ex had his birthady a few days ago and I actually forgot...I would wait for it like two weeks before it came or a month, just so I can text him happy birthday. And one day when I saw it was January 4..I said "oh yeah, it was his birthday yesterday" I couldn't believe I forgot it!

 

When I would pass by his work I would always turn my head so I can see him. Now when I pass by there while going somewhere I forget to even look! It's really a sign I'm 100% over him.

 

If my current boyfriend wasn't in the picture, I really don't think I would have been this much over my ex.

 

Work on finding someone new, don't just sit there and let them come to you...don't force it though...

 

Now I say to myself, I can't believe I wanted to marry him. Only now, do I realize we were never meant for each other and how it would have never worked out.

 

We were incompatible...it took me time to realize that, but I am sure glad I did.

 

There is also a difference between missing having a boyfriend and missing someone.