RookieoftheYea Posted January 15, 2017 Share Posted January 15, 2017 My story... On the last day of our vacation, she was distant and I brought it to her attention. She wound up breaking up with me, saying we weren't meshing. I was devastated. I didn't even ask questions, I didn't even try to talk about it. I just sat there and cried. We didn't talk the whole rest of the vacation day, the ride to the airport, at the airport and the entire flight home. It was horrible. I went NC immediately as soon as we landed home and went our separate ways. I broke NC after 14 days. I think I broke it because the mistake I think I made was not talking about it when I had the chance. I had so many unanswered questions and just couldn't understand how it happened. I was completely blindsided by her decision. It was killing me. I called. We spoke for over an hour. After general excuses, she finally said when I expressed to her that I felt she was being distant, it made her realize she couldn't keep hurting me. I was amazing and she was in it because I was the type of person everyone looks for (nice guy syndrome) but she loved me for who I was, but not romantically and didn't want to continue to force it. There was just no spark. During the awkward silence after the news, I simply hung up on her. Ouch. I got all the reasons why people say not to break NC, BUT for some reason I feel better. I'm not hanging on to false hope anymore. I know I have to start NC over again and this time, there's nothing else left to say to be tempted to contact her again. Anything after this, would just be pathetic. I'm gonna be okay and I can finally move on. I hope someone else can learn or relate to my story. NC is necessary, but sometimes we need to learn the hard way in how to apply it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
albie Posted January 15, 2017 Share Posted January 15, 2017 Exact same thing happened to me. Spending a weekend in a resort, she acts distant, doesn't feel the spark, want to be a friend and all that BS. I was sad and didn't beg her. Horrible journey back home. I go NC for 7 days and think that maybe we can work on it. She says she wants to be single and doesn't want to try. I am satisfied that atleast I tried and I have no regrets now. She pushed me away and I chose to walk. Today it's 91 days of NC apart from a happy new year text from her. I know exactly how you feel but focus on yourself for now. First few weeks are hard and then you don't even count the days. Sometimes you feel they didn't even care for you and within an instant made a unanimous decision. NC does help a lot. In these 3 months I ended up getting a promotion, move to a European country and a massive pay rise. I have been meeting new women now which helps to grow that confidence back. So either way NC does work if you apply or correctly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shegottaberigh Posted January 16, 2017 Share Posted January 16, 2017 Me too! I contacted my ex the other day for a favor. He ended up saying "I'm here if you need anything." And I said "im here if you need anything as well." And he responded very happily "I'm so glad to know that, that means a lot!" Now he felt relieved and happy and forgiven and can move on with his life thinking its all good. (He left me for someone else) it's not fair, and I ended up feeling worse after talking to him and reading this texts from him. Now I know the nc rule is there for a reason Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RookieoftheYea Posted January 16, 2017 Author Share Posted January 16, 2017 Thank you Albie and Shegottaberigh! Despite my strength while writing my story, the situation hasn't left my mind. Ugh. Only one day down since NC and I can't believe I woke up this morning wanting to text her to meet up to return frivolous items. Maybe hoping if she SAW me, she would think twice. Thankfully, I deleted her number so I couldn't. I feel so pathetic. I don't understand how someone can describe you as perfect, but doesn't want to be with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
albie Posted January 16, 2017 Share Posted January 16, 2017 Thank you Albie and Shegottaberigh! Despite my strength while writing my story, the situation hasn't left my mind. Ugh. Only one day down since NC and I can't believe I woke up this morning wanting to text her to meet up to return frivolous items. Maybe hoping if she SAW me, she would think twice. Thankfully, I deleted her number so I couldn't. I feel so pathetic. I don't understand how someone can describe you as perfect, but doesn't want to be with you. That's the line which is used to soften the blow unfortunately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emptyeffort Posted January 16, 2017 Share Posted January 16, 2017 i think it was a good thing to break NC this once. i can see where you are coming from. i thought long and hard about what i wanted to say or talk about when i decided that i couldnt keep contact and wanted to go nc. i said what i wanted to say and never talked to her again. its better than obsessing about it while also having to deal with the breakup at hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littleel672 Posted January 17, 2017 Share Posted January 17, 2017 I think you needed to break it because you needed some answers. There's nothing wrong with that, sometimes I think certain things need to be said. Now however, you can start again, keep positive and know that the more space and time you take, it does get easier. Even if you sometimes have setbacks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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