How to ask?

[Ineedadate]

I'm trying to figure out how to ask out this girl that I like. I'm in college and I've known her for about two months now and we talk online practically everyday and we hang out, eat meals, watch movies etc several times a week. I want to ask her out, but not have it seem weird or anything.

[MetallicAguy]

First off, stop seeing each other that much so it creates an attraction(the attraction grows as you see each other less, she'll want more of you). Ok so you say you talk "several" times a week with her. Well simple as this. Talk to her for how long you want (not more then 10-15 minutes) and then end the conversation with "Hey, nice talking to ya, how about we get together some time to go to [specific place: restuarant, movies, etc.]". So yeah, just about does it.

[Trojanmn2]

Dont do what was said above. You're in college man, be a college man. You guys have already been hanging out on dates and being friends or whatever, take the the first step by taking intiative and control of the situation by testing your feelings, hang out again, just get to talking, maybe after a good movie like "The Notebook" and just try to hint at it or ask specific questions, tell her about you feel, and you really feel the vibe when you look at her when you guys are snuggled up on the couch or bed, lean for a kiss. DO NOT play any games like stop seeing her. Just dont over kill it by OVERseeing her. Especially if you land a kiss, dont be up her rear after one kiss or after a few love talks. You're in college man, so I am assuming you're 18. Dont play high school games man.

[DropToZero]

Haha....uhh...oh god..another one.

Umm....yea, if you're hanging with her every day and talking online a lot...I dont honestly know if you're going to get what you want. First off....MetallicAguy is right...whoever posted above me, its not games...its reality. If he is seeing her every day and talking online, he's ALREADY overseeing her. Tone it down a bit...but don't become a disappear.

 

Umm....If you're hangin with her every day and stuff, who knows, you could already have her deeply interested in you. What would be helpful in knowing, is just....is she flirting with you...has she touched you...hugged you....teased you....are you teasing her? Its not highschool games....psh....its flirting....mixed signals create attraction. Anyways...if she's doing most of the above stuff I asked you, I'd say you would have no problem asking for a date...if she's not....you may just be a good 'friend'...lets hope not if that's not what you want.

[LostInaTrapOfMyOwn]

oookay, girl opinion time I think.

 

If you guys see and talk to each other that much, then obviously you already have a good relationship going, just right now it's more school-buddy than boyfriend-girlfriend. There's a couple of options to help step it up.

1. Ask her out. Plain and simple, takes guts but I'm thinking she's probably interested in you anyway. And since you talk all the time, you probably know something/somewhere she'd want to go

2. Ask her if she's ever thought of you as more than a friend. If she says no, you can save face by saying something like "okay, I didn't think so, but we spend so much time together I just thought I'd..check" add a big jokey-smile in here too

 

One thing that is soooo not an option: Getting your friend to ask her if she likes you, or suddenly avoiding her. I had this happen in my first year and I was pretty pissed that the dude was still trying to play highschool games.

**PS: be aware that if it does work out for you guys, since you're such good friends, you're pretty much skipping over the whole casual dating phase, and jumping right into relationship territory

 

Good luck!

[Trojanmn2]

Like i said earlier, playing the hide and seek and find me and ill get back to you is A GAME, whats reality here is that you two have spending time with each other and what else is reality is that you both are in COLLEGE might i stress? Just be straight up about it.

[SkyFire]

First off, stop seeing each other that much so it creates an attraction(the attraction grows as you see each other less, she'll want more of you). Ok so you say you talk "several" times a week with her. Well simple as this. Talk to her for how long you want (not more then 10-15 minutes) and then end the conversation with "Hey, nice talking to ya, how about we get together some time to go to [specific place: restuarant, movies, etc.]". So yeah, just about does it.

 

Dude what are you talking about? Attraction grows because you CREATE it. If you dont try to get her attracted, she never will be.

 

In order to get someone to be attracted to you, you have to do a certain amout of work.

 

 

First off, get her number.

 

Then ask her to hang out.

[MetallicAguy]

Oh whoops, I see how I messed up. I thought of the situation differently. Ok nevermind, your right SkyFire.

[Ddog187]

Don't be scared when you ask her out. If this is your first time yes it will be very scary at first but once you get it over and done with you will be so proud of your self. Try using a line like "hey (hername) I really like hanging out with you and talking to you so I was wondering will you got out with me" try a line like that or just make up your own line. We all know you can do it so just believe in your self and you will be able to. And Good Luck.

[MetallicAguy]

You never say that 2 words "will you" or "want to" in an asking out for a date phrase. You have to talk bs with her for 2 minutes minimum then you say you have to go then you say "Well hey, let's get together sometime for a movie, if your ok with it you want to exchange numbers, AIM sn's?" That's a better line.

[DropToZero]

MetallicAguy is my new bud on this site....even tho you're 4 years younger than me...I wish I had your knowledge..or at least the knowledge I know now back when I was just beginning HS. If you want to help..check out that "modesty vs. badguy" post in dating, help me convince that guy he's going to be lonely if he doesnt find out why his 'nice only' methods aren't going to work..now or in the future.

 

Umm anyways, to the guy who said not to play games....college is THE play to flirt and as most would say, "play games"....I dont know what you're talking about, it doesnt matter how old you are...girls always are interested in teasing and flirting. It took me a long time to figure out that adults...are just big kids....nothing more.

[MetallicAguy]

Well LtAwesome. I've read ALOT of scientific studies on body language and signs and everything first off. Then I signed up for David DeAngelo's newsletter. I didn't need to buy his eBook because he already tells you, it's the whole sexual tension thing. Other than that maintain good hygiene and don't wear ****** clothes. Mainly though, easiest way to figure out women is definitely 1. To tease them (don't start an issue about it, because it works, and you know it lol) 2. Body language is key, you can tell what their thinking and everything. Well maybe not EVERYTHING they're thinking but you can figure out if they are thinking about you. Basically (the important stuff) you can figure out whether their flirting, repelled by you, anything really. Oh yeah, and if you have a crush on a girl, remember you have to attract her in the 5 senses, now you may not be able to do 'taste' yet but that's your job lol. So yeah, that's mostly where I learned my stuff.

[Carnatic]

There is a lot of arguing going on in respect to your situtation.

 

Brush aside all the theorising and take some action, the time to ask her out is now.

 

You've known her for 2 months and become quite close, starting hanging out, she may well be waiting for you to ask her out. It is true that you run the danger of becoming too much like a friend, but if a girl takes an interest in a guy, just like that, like what she did then chances are it wasn't just friendship she was after. If she wants you to ask her out then you have to do it now.

 

As for metallicaguy's ideas of playing girls and stuff, that's no good if you aren't a player, you have to be yourself. You can't be a shy, nice guy and pretend you be a bastard... I'm not sure what relevance this has to your life but something related was mentioned in this post.