How to proceed?

[hershey1kiss2]

I had a falling out with this girl I was seeing briefly. SHe ended things to focus on some health issues prior to our falling out. About 2 months ago she went through my cell phone and got upset that I had been talking to other females despite her not wanting to commit or put a label and eventually ended things anyways. She has now message me once in each of the last three weeks to see what is up. But it does not seem that she wants to resolve our issues it seems to be proceeding without confronting our issues. She is expected to be out of mutual friend's birthday dinner this coming weekend. How should I proceed? And why is she maintaining contact? You last summer we had a falling out and did not spend two months for issues surrounding us dating. Other than the one friend whose birthday it is he is our only mutual friend. Because we live in different cities so there is nothing linking us and I do not understand why she seems to always come back in some way shape or form.

[mhowe]

But it does not seem that she wants to resolve our issues it seems to be proceeding without confronting our issues

 

Why would you do that? She maintains contact because you respond.

[hershey1kiss2]

My plan is to tell her that either we resolve issues or to leave me alone

[mhowe]

Sounds like a good plan.

[hershey1kiss2]

And what if she does want to resolve our issues? I just don't see why she feels entitled to be upset that I was talking to other women if she did not want to put a label or commit and ended things

[mhowe]

And what if she does want to resolve our issues?

 

My plan is to tell her that either we resolve issues or to leave me alone

 

The second half of your plan.

[Movingforward3]

That's a good plan. If u want her back I wouldn't be so direct. Try talking and having fun and see if she brings it up first

[hershey1kiss2]

The issue is not if I want her back of course I do lol. The real question is does she miss me unless you still have feelings and when she still want me back

[JustWishing]

I think mhowe has that covered

 

It seems to me that you two are not very compatible. There are trust issues and it sounds like some drama going on with her going through your phone...Is that the kind of relationship you want to be in?

[hershey1kiss2]

I don't know what it is with her really. The health issue I mentioned was her recent diagnosis of leukemia. Her emotions could be all over the place. I was very supportive to her even after she ended things. She may have the thought that what she did was wrong and unfair for me to not try to move on after she ended things and did not want a label. I forgive her for going through my phone as I have since communicated to her that I don't need to talk to others if she would commit. I don't know why she had the thought to go through itbin the first place as I was very supportive and stuck by her side regardless. She may not want a relationship but she cannot deny what I've done for her. So her msging me once a week could be her saying that because she's always been prideful to admit her faults.

[hershey1kiss2]

I don't believe compatibility is in the way. We have so many similar interests and mindset. We have gone out so many times and always ad fun with talks and laughter.